- Resources: Laws, Searching, Reunion
- Resources to Help Parents Keep Their Babies
- Favorite Adoption Quotes
- Considering Open Adoption? What You Should Know
- Response to The Adoption Option
- UPDATE: NY Adoptee Rights
- Letter to Birth Mother or Sibling
- Giving Up Your Baby?
- Writing the First Letter
- 'Positive' Adoption Language?
- What We Think About Adoption
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Saturday, October 30, 2010
The boy called Grayson Vaughn may be home already, with his father, Benjamin Wyrembek (see post earlier today, below) but there are still a few hours left to vote for the Demon in Adoption Award at the Pound Pub Legacy website.The deadline is midnight (Saturday)!
Here are the candidates, with a short description from their website:
The nominees are:
- LDS Family Services: for being the most secretive of all adoption agencies,
|Benjamin Wyrembek's son|
"Grayson is on his way home to be with his Dad. This will be a hard day but will get easier with each passing day. Grayson and Ben you have alot of people that support you. Here's to a wonderful life together!"
Posted on the Facebook page, Give Grayson Back, two hours ago, and the transfer was confirmed at the opposing "Keep Grayson Home" page, where they are asking their 7,123 supporters [are they all adopters, I wonder] on FB to pray for the boy "as he moves today to live with his bio [real] father in Ohio."
I am so pleased to post this good news. Whatever Benjamin Wyrembek chooses to call his son, I applaud him for working so long and tirelessly to reclaim him from Christy and Jason Vaughn of Sellersburg, Indiana, who dragged out this custody battle for three friggen' years, and any trauma that the boy suffers is totally their fault. In this case, I have little respect for the boy's birth/natural mother, Drucilla Bocvarov. It will be interesting to see what happens with the child as he grows, and whether she does have a relationship with him, which I hope she is able to.
Personally, I think the father has every right to divest the name from the child as, especially if it is true that it a family the name of the Vaughns, as one of our intrepid followers has noted.
Thursday, October 28, 2010
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Sometime ago, I played duplicate bridge every week with an older woman, Nellie. Over the course of several years, my bridge partner told me about her daughter, Denise, who with her sixty-year-old husband, had adopted two American boys at birth and a Chinese girl. I heard that the boys were terrors; they lied, stole, and broke things. The girl was a doll.
Saturday, October 23, 2010
Christopher Sutton was troubled from the beginning, even getting in fights in preschool. As he got older and his behavior worsened, his adoptive parents, John, an attorney, and his wife Susan, sought treatment for him through counseling and boarding schools. When he was 16, they sent him to Paradise Cove, a brutal behavior modification program in Western Samoa.
His sister Melissa, also adopted and seven years younger, insisted that their parents loved both of them; adoption was not an issue.
Friday, October 22, 2010
Christopher Sutton’s mother gave him up so that he could have a better life; instead he will spend his life in a Florida penitentiary for the August 22, 2004 murder of his adoptive mother and attempted murder of his adoptive father.
Thursday, October 21, 2010
by Joyce Bahr
When they surrendered their babies, first mothers were never given a right to privacy. They were never informed that adoption is a loss,
Posted by Lorraine Dusky at 11:14 AM
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
My letter to the Speaker of the New York Assembly:
Sag Harbor, NY 11963
Albany, NY 12248
Sag Harbor, NY 11963
Sheldon Silver, Speaker of the AssemblyLegislative Office Building 932
Albany, NY 12248
Dear Speaker Silver:
You are probably aware that there is a movement afoot to give adopted people the same rights as the rest of us: the right to know who they were at birth. Today there are two bills, one in the Assembly (A8410) and one in the Senate (S5269) which would restore equality to this class of people who were stripped of the right to know their original identities when they were born.
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Makes me crazy, this does.
We were not promised anything! And if your social worker did tell you that once having relinquished the goods (that is, your baby) you could live a life under a rock and pretend that you did not have a child, she was lying! Cotton growers in the South
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
What did I find?
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Saturday, October 9, 2010
* * *
While we wait and watch to see what happens to Benjamin Wyrembek's son, there is another case of father's rights being denied, this one in Utah, my least favorite state: A young father in Virginia, John Wyatt, 22, was given the round-around by the Sentara Potomac Hospital in Virginia, but eventually learned two days later that the mother, college student Emily Colleen Fahland, managed somehow to relinquish in Utah.
Uh, oh....Utah and them Mormons like to get those babies away from single mothers...
Friday, October 8, 2010
Grayson's father will be able to take him home soon. We hope. From the Toledo Blade:
Posted by Lorraine Dusky at 3:46 PM
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
While adoptive parents like Scott Simon present the happy-dappy point of view about adoption and the effects it is not likely to have on his children, there are experts who disagree quite radically. And as a first/birth mother I have been reading, thinking and writing about the myriad issues my daughter, relinquished in 1966, faced, and the host of problems stemming from them.
Monday, October 4, 2010
Scott Simon, host of National Public Radio's Weekend Edition and author of Baby, We Were Meant for Each Other: In Praise of Adoption appeared on Oregon Public Broadcasting's Think Out Loud, October 4. Prior to his appearance, three guests --- an adoptee/birthmother and two adoptive mothers -- and several callers spoke. While their views on adoption varied, they acknowledged the trauma that can accompany adoption and the need for children to know their first families.
Sunday, October 3, 2010
It’s not enough that Scott Simon is glorifying adoption through his new book, Baby, We Were Meant for Each Other: In Praise of Adoption. Simon, the host of National Public Radio's Weekend Edition, is now pimping for an adoption agency.
He’s coming to Portland, yes, super liberal Portland, to do a benefit for Journeys of the Heart Adoption Services. His appearance is co-sponsored by Bouneff & Challey, Portland’s oldest adoption law firm, operating under the name Adoptions Northwest. John Challey is one of the co-founders of Oregon’s largest adoption agency, Open Adoption & Family Services. (Bouneff is no longer practicing law).
Journeys of the Heart Adoption Services is Oregon’s second largest adoption agency, marketing both domestic and foreign adoptions. While total non-related infant adoptions in Oregon declined from from 402 in 2008 to 364 in 2009, Journeys increased its adoptions from 18 to 27. Journeys employs the usual seductive advertisements designed to convince young women that their infant would be better off with one of the glamorous couples whose pictures adorn the website than with its own mother.
What’s really appalling about all this is that Simon knows next to nothing about adoption. Simon became a father for the first time at age 50, adopting Elise from China in 2004 and returning to scarf up Lina in 2007.
According to Simon:
“Adoption is a miracle. I don't mean just that it's amazing, terrific, and a wonderful thing to do. I mean that it is, as the dictionary says, "a surprising and welcome event that is not explicable by natural or scientific laws and is therefore considered to be the work of divine agency."Simon wipes out little Elise’s and Lina’s birth families and cultural heritage without a bat of an eye lid. Scott, when you come down to earth, I urge you to read the E. B. Donaldson Adoption Institute report: Beyond Cultural Camp: Promoting Healthy Identity Formation in Adoption.
"My wife and I, not having had children in the traditional, Abraham-and-Sarah-begat manner, have learned to make jokes about the way we've had our family. ("Pregnant! Why would you do that? Those clothes! And you can't drink for months!") … But we cannot imagine anything more remarkable and marvelous than having a stranger put into your arms who becomes, in minutes, your flesh, your blood: your life.” Scott Simon's Family
Simon is using his NPR connections to publicize his book and his celestial view of adoption. He’s been a guest on Minnesota Public Radio and Terry Gross’ Fresh Air. He's appearing on Think Out Loud, an Oregon public radio show (91.5 FM in Portland) on Monday morning, October 4 at 9:00 PDT. The show will be rebroadcast at 9:00 PM and available as a podcast. Call-in questions at 1-888-665-5865 or post them at on the website. Tell your adoption story at Think Out Loud: Adoption and Adaption.