' [Birth Mother] First Mother Forum: Adoptees more likely to commit suicide

Tuesday, September 10, 2013

Adoptees more likely to commit suicide

Lorraine
A new study has found that adopted teens were almost four times more likely to attempt suicide than those who lived with their natural parents, even after adjustment for factors associated with suicidal behavior such as psychiatric disorder symptoms, personality traits, family environment, and academic disengagement. Girls were more likely than boys to attempt suicide. About 75 percent of the adopted teens (more than 1,200 all living in Minnesota) in the study were adopted before the age of two and were foreign born—mostly from South Korea. [1]

All of the adopted kids, who were between 11 and 21 years old during the study period, had been taken in by their families before age two, and had a biologically unrelated teenage sibling in the same home. Although this study could not determine why the adopted teens were more likely to attempt suicide,
the authors note that other research has suggested burdens carried by adopted children that may be contributing factors. Almost three quarters of the adopted children were born abroad, most of the foreign-born children were from South Korea and 60 percent of those were girls.

I read the study today but hardly had a reaction because this finding adds to the growing body of literature about adoption and suicide, a topic that I lived through when my daughter committed suicide in 2007. Another adoption reformer and author from my generation, Mirah Riben, also had a daughter who committed suicide. I remember hearing long ago about the adopted daughter of the writer Shana Alexander who committed suicide. Another first mother emailed me yesterday to tell me that the counselor she saw after her daughter found her, and then rejected her, was an adoptive mother whose (adopted) daughter committed suicide. Though my daughter had epilepsy, which is also a marker for suicide, the effect of her being adopted cannot be summarily ignored. Adoption and epilepsy in her case went hand in hand, thus increasing the probability that she would one day take her own life. She made several attempts before she succeeded in what she seemed to want so very much.

Yet each time an adopted person commits suicide, to the families involved, it feels like an isolated event. It happens only to us.

But apparently adoptee suicide is from from a random occurance.

WHEN YOU GOOGLE SUICIDE AND ADOPTION
Though we are all statistics of one sort or another, this just happens to be a very grim one. I now fall into the category of  "birth mother whose daughter committed suicide." Oddly enough, I have less of an emotional trigger hearing or talking about it than I do when presented an invitation to a baby shower or pictures of friend's new grandkids, because that immediately, terrifyingly takes me back to the distress and turmoil of relinquishing my daughter--and reminds me of that oxytocin study reported here last week. Though the new study on adoptee suicide is making news, I had looked into the subject earlier, and written about it before, for my memoir-in-progress, that Hole in my Heart

While there are no good statistics on adoptees who commit actually suicide in this country, Google “suicide and adoption” and what pops up is a 2001 entry from Pediatrics, “Adoption as a Risk Factor for Attempted Suicide during Adolescence.”[2] In 1990, the Search Institute of Minneapolis, which studies what factors help children succeed, found that teenagers who were adopted as infants are more at risk for suicide than non-adopted youth. [3] A 2005 Swedish study found that international adoptees clearly were at greater risk for suicide attempts and deaths than adoptees from the same country, but both groups had increased risk compared to non-adoptees.[4] The researchers at the University of Cincinnati College of Medicine looked at more than 6,500 students in grades seven through twelve and found that nearly eight percent (7.6) of those who were adopted had attempted suicide in the past year, compared with only three percent of their peers. They were also more likely to receive psychological counseling, nearly seventeen percent (16.9) of adopted youth compared with eight percent  (8.2) of the non-adopted.

Of course this is not news that is welcome in adoption circles. B. J. Lifton wrote that when she voiced her opinion that the percentage of adoptee suicide was high at a seminar for adoptive parents some years ago, a prominent psychiatrist asked if that could be deleted from the tape. B.J. agreed, but later wrote she was sorry she had.[5] When I mentioned adoption and suicide at an American Adoption Congress conference a few years ago, it was generally ignored. This is not a subject the adoption industry, or even people who attend AAC  conferences, want anyone to talk about. With this new study, it will be harder to ignore, but talking about "adoption and suicide" remains taboo. 

Just as talking about "primal wound" is taboo in some circles. Like anything else, we all have our individual reactions to the various stresses that each of us faces. For some the wound will be much deeper and have a greater lifelong effect; others will seemingly skate over the issue and express little curiosity about their roots or adoption story. But to flat out deny that being relinquished for adoption and raised in an familial environment other than the one we are related to by blood has little to no effect seems to be the height of folly and akin to putting on blinders. Reality is often not pretty.

I'm thinking about this today as I had implored Canadian officials to stop an adoption just last week and return a child to a mother who desperately wants her, as Dusten Brown fights in court after court for the right to raise his own daughter, as we fielded comments last week from a school counselor who claimed many of her students would be better off if they had been adopted, and as somewhere a young woman is considering the "adoption option" that is being made so very attractive by adoption-agency workers as the "loving" choice for her baby. Reality tells a different story. --lorraine


If the footnotes look different from usual, that's because I'm taking most of this from that Hole in My Heart, my memoir-in-progress. May not be copied in any form or used without permission. Copyright Lorraine Dusky 2013.


[1] Margaret A. Keyes, Stephen M. Malone, Anu Sharma, PhD, William G. Iacono, PhDa, Matt McGue, Risk of Suicide Attempt in Adopted and Nonadopted Offspring, Pediatrics, 2013. 
                                                                                                                                           
[2] Slap, Goodman and Huang, Adoption as a Risk Factor for Attempted Suicide during Adolescence, Pediatrics, Vol. 108, No. 2 August 2001, p.30. http://pediatrics.aappublications.org/cgi/content/abstract/108/2/e30 The study included students who were living with their mothers, adoptive  or biological, and had not been separated from them for more than six months. All were in their first marriages, to filter out children of divorce. Not surprisingly, teens who contemplated suicide were more likely to be depressed, smoke cigarettes, engage in delinquent behavior, have low self-esteem and—be female. More recently, Psychiatric Times (January 26, 2009; http://www.psychiatrictimes.com/display/article/10168/1367897 ) reported that researchers at the University of Minnesota found that adopted youth  had a higher incidence of clinical disorders (such as ADHD or ODD) than the non-adopted. Any research showing that adopted individuals had a higher incidence of emotional trauma and related problems has always been controversial and met with disdain by many in the adopting community, and generally attributed to the greater income of many adoptive parents, and their acute sensitivity to their children’s welfare. When I mentioned it at a conference a few years ago, it was generally ignored. Other pro-adoption, adoptive-parents writers dismiss it as “garbage research,” as I was repeatedly rebuked when I mentioned it on a PBS news program with Prof. Elizabeth Bartholet of Harvard, adoptive mother and major proponent of international adoption. Interestingly, we were guests the day that "Baby Jessica" or Anna Schmidt, as she was named by her natural parents, was turned over to them.

However, the researchers of the Minnesota study found that these possible migrating factors for the high incidence of adopted teenagers in therapy and otherwise seeking emotional and/or psychiatric counseling did not explain the differences, and that their over-representation is due to the fact that the adoptees are experiencing more of the kinds of behavioral problems for which parents refer their kids. The Minnesota study included 540 non-adopted adolescents born in that state and 692 domestic and international adoptees. At the time of the assessments, the study participants ranged in age from 11 to 21 years, and the average age at time of placement was four months. From the Psychiatric Times: “The assessments were rigorous and involved use of the Diagnostic Interview for Children and Adolescents-Revised (DICA-R) and the Structured Clinical Interview for DSM-III-R (SCID-II). I’ve gotten clinical here because this study has been attacked by adoptive parents on various blogs.
                           
[3] Lost and Found, p. 311.

[4] Annika von Borczyskowski, Anders Hjern MD, PhD, Frank Lindblad MD, PhDBo Vinnerljung PhD., Suicidal Behavior in National and International Adoptees, Social Psychiatry and Psychiatric Epidemiology, February 2006, Volume 41,Issue 2, pp 95-102.

[5] Lost and Found, p. 311. 
___________________
FROM FMF
'Love' hormone's dark side may explain secondary infertility
Remembering My Daughter on the Anniversary of her Death
What are the happy birth moms celebrating?

READING
The Primal Wound: Understanding the Adopted Child  "As an adoptee, I could not have written this book better myself. It is an extremely insightful book which opened up a world of understanding to myself and also to my loved ones. It helped me understand why I am the way that I am, why I do some of the things that I do, why I struggle with love in my life, and why I have this subconscious fear of abandonment and trust

This book is a definite "must read" for all parents of adopted children. I know that as a parent you will resist believing in the The Primal Wound but you must for the benefit of your children. You will learn to understand your adopted children and will be able to help them throughout their lives - sometimes even in the smallest way, i.e. the simple reassurance that you WILL return home after work.I met my birth family at 30 years old. Then I read this book a few years later. This book made a difference in my life. It will make a difference in your life, too."--Coco Ventura, at Amazon
 

37 comments :

  1. First, Lorriane, I want to tell you how sorry I am for your loss of Jane.

    I was adopted in 1966 and just really got some therapy this year...it was way overdue. I am also the adoptive mom of a daughter from the PRC who is 12.

    What I struggle with a lot is not so much wanting to commit suicide but wanting to not be in the world any more. There are many times when I am driving that I fantasize my driving off the road, taking an overdose or ending my life in another way. Then I come back to reality. Many times an awful day of turmoil can be followed by a day when I am on top of the world.

    My daughter also expresses her worry that she might try to cut herself with a knife or do something to injure herself. She always tells me about it and says that "the thought" goes back and forth in her brain all the time.

    I don't want to kill myself necessarily, but I don't (many times) want to live either. Deanna Doss Shrodes has written about this subject recently at AdopteeRestoration. I struggle back and forth CONSTANTLY, and I am also the master of making myself look absolutely fine. If I do every let that thought take me over, everyone in my life would be shocked. But, I promised our daughter that I would never leave her, and I can't break that promise no matter how hard it gets

    I am in therapy and my daughter is in and out of therapy...

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  2. The truth is, I too often thought about suicide, way before I had my daughter. Thought about it in just the way you describe, Anonymous, considering various options. In my case, I am quite sure it was due to my serious PMS, now diagnosed as PMDD (premenstrual dysphoric disorder) which is the extreme form of PMS. My mother had it too, which I why although we were able to be close later on, and during her periods when she was not premenstrual, I have memories of her being wildly out of control with a terrible temper during much of my teen years. In my own case, I brought my PMS under control with inexpensive progesterone prescribed by a forward-thinking gynecologist many years ago. Now it is popular to prescribe on the mood drugs, but progesterone cannot be patented and so no drug company has done the double-blind testing that it needs to become better accepted by the medical community. It is more widely used for PMS in Europe.

    I have no idea whether your mood swings might be PMS related, but you could take note of your suicidal thoughts. I have suggested progesterone to other women, and it has helped tremendously. You do need a fairly good dose for it to be effective, but it appears to have no adverse side effects.

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  3. Peoples Republic of China...sorry

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  4. For therapy for cutting and whatnot, you should look into DBT.

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  5. Ideation about suicide and suicide attempts are usually side effects of mental illness. There are slight disorders, such as mild anxiety or depression, and more moderate to cases, such as manic episodes, panic disorders, and bipolar conditions.

    The hormones related to monthly cycles affect some women much more then others. Progesterone can cause depression.

    I would urge anyone who has thought about suicide to see a psychiatrist and a therapist. Get tested for hormone and thyroid levels. A psychiatrist can recommend medicine that will settle mood disorders.

    There is a strong genetic component to mental illness and it runs in families. Certain environmental issues may "turn on" those genes, both in the womb and after birth.

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  6. Michael Blosil, the 18-year-old (adopted) son of Marie Osmond and her ex-husband Brian Blosil, jumped to his death from the roof of his Los Angeles apartment building in February 2010. Blosil battled substance abuse and depression for much of his life -- he had his first stint in rehab at age 12, and first tried to commit suicide after his parents' divorce in 2007.

    I think his (birth)mother attended his funeral.

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  7. Have considered it but said noSeptember 11, 2013 at 11:28 AM

    Are you familiar with this study?

    A new study from Karolinska Institutet and Johns Hopkins University in Baltimore, USA, shows that adopted children from a biological family with experience of suicide were more likely to themselves attempt suicide if their adoptive mother had also been treated for a psychiatric disorder...Their results show that the likelihood of an adopted child attempting suicide later in life was unaffected if there was only one biological parent who had committed or attempted suicide or if the adoptive parent had been receiving psychiatric treatment before the child turned 18; however, there was a four-fold risk if a biological parent displayed suicidal behaviour and the adoptive mother had been in psychiatric care.

    http://chinaadoptiontalk.blogspot.com/2012/02/new-study-adoptees-suicide-risk.html

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  8. Considered it but said noSeptember 11, 2013 at 11:42 AM

    In my adoptive family,there were four children, 3 adoptive and one biological. The biological child had many problems with mental illness; she inherited Bipolar disorder from my father and chronic anxiety from my mother. She has struggled with suicidal thoughts for most of her adult life and once she attempted it. Her psychiatrist is continually "tweaking" her cocktail of psych meds. None of the adopted sibs have ever attempted suicide, though some of us struggle with our moods.

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  9. Thank you for bringing this to our attention, but the study seems a bit convoluted. How many cases did they look at (because all that data seems hard to collect). Of course, I am not surprised there would also be a biological component as well as situational to depression, mood swings, mental outlook, etc.

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  10. http://www.sciguru.com/newsitem/12763/Adoptees-higher-suicide-risk-if-both-biological-and-adoptive-parents-have-psychiatric-problems?utm_source=twitterfeed&utm_medium=twitter

    The study was carried out using data from Swedish registries dating from 1973 to 2003, and is a retrospective cohort study of 2,516 individuals with a biological parent who had committed or attempted suicide, and 5,875 individuals with a biological parent who had undergone psychiatric treatment but not attempted suicide. The researchers studied these groups to ascertain whether an adoptive parent in psychiatric care moderated the incidence of attempted suicide in adopted children.

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  11. DBT?

    PLEASE ONLY HIT POST ONCE. SORRY THERE is no note telling you that the comment is in the pipeline.

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  12. It doesn't surprise me that there would be a higher risk of suicide in the adoptee population. It's very hard for many of us to come to terms with the fact that our own parents (seemingly) didn't value us enough to keep us, love us, and protect us. It seemed like I was just tossed out into the world, as a helpless infant, to fend for myself. As an adoptee, it can feel like your existence is a mistake. I have struggled with the issue of feeling on a deep soul level that I wasn't meant to be here. I think it is part of the PW. This is one of the (many) reasons I am so adamant about Ronnie Brown not becoming an adoptee. The potential psychological damage to some adoptees is too great.

    The mother of Gia Allemand (the reality star who was on the Bachelor) said in an interview that her daughter suffered severe mood swings with her cycles. From your description, it sounds like she was suffering from PMDD. Some type of hormone therapy may have helped her enormously and could possibly have averted this terrible tragedy.

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  13. I begged Adam Pertman to have the Institute do some decent research on this subject and offered to FUND IT! Fell on deaf ears, like my suggestion about contacting Angelina Jolie that he said he would do. Oh well.

    The fact is that many sucides are unreported as such. Many are reported as accidental deaths. And death certificates don't state if the person is adopted! So stats are hard to come by, like everything els ein adoption - like abuse in adoptive homes compared to abuse in non-adoptive homes, particualrly sexual abuse.

    Lack of transparanecy and sealed records keep us - intentionally - in the dark. And when studies appear and children die, and trafficking is reported -- it's so easy to call it an oddity and not the norm, and simply ignore it and go on with business as susual...

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  14. I was in a suicide bereavement group several years ago after losing my spouse (also my relinquished child's father) to suicide. In our group there was also an AP who had lost her teenaged adopted son to suicide.

    To be honest, it has crossed my own mind many times over the years since the loss of my child to adoption. However, that is not a legacy I want to leave my children with; but I understand the low places adoption loss can take you.

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  15. Here is a link to an article about the study with some observations taken from the article.

    http://www.globalpost.com/dispatch/news/thomson-reuters/130910/adopted-teens-may-be-at-higher-risk-suicide

    'Although this study could not determine why the adopted teens were more likely to attempt suicide, the authors note that other research has suggested burdens carried by adopted children that may be contributing factors.

    In the Swedish study, for example, researchers showed that substance abuse, suicidal behavior and mental illness among the biological parents of domestically adopted kids could explain about one third of the children's increased risk for suicide.

    For children adopted from abroad, Keyes' team writes, there is also the possibility that loss of cultural identity and experience of ethnic discrimination only add to the pressures on a child.

    "Other mediating factors, not considered in our study, may include: heritable risk, prenatal factors, factors unique to relinquishment by a biological parent, early trauma, weak attachment to adoptive families and loss of cultural identity and ethnic discrimination," Keyes told Reuters Health by email.
    Two of those factors may be most critical in determining suicide risk, according to Ritch C. Savin-Williams, a professor of developmental psychology at Cornell University in Ithaca, namely: genetics and early trauma.
    "Many of us believe that these two might well be the most important distinguishing factors separating the two groups, answering the question of why were these babies put up for adoption in the first place," he told Reuters Health.'

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  16. "Early trauma"? Perhaps losing your mother who feels normal and cozy at an early age? Perhaps losing that sense of stability and love at a preverbal stage, so that one is never able to adequately access it or think it through and deal with it?

    Yes, indeed that would qualify for "early trauma," which could also be called "primal wound."

    Thanks Anonymous for pointing us to this analysis.

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  17. Regarding "early trauma." We do not know the exact age these kids were separated from mother. The study looked at children adopted before the age of 2. A lot can happen in 2 years. "Early trauma" could include mistreatment by first parents, malnutrition, or neglect suffered in an orphanage. As stated in the analysis, the "early trauma" may be directly related to the primary reason the child was given up in the first place.

    Adoption may be a cause of "early trauma" but it also may be an effect. It's probably some of both.

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  18. Okay,anonymous, have it your way, but you want to explain this away also:


    ...factors unique to relinquishment by a biological parent....

    That takes us back to "primal wound."

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  19. Please don't make this a fight about the Primal Wound.

    The fact is, this study, like most studies, is probably somewhat localized and flawed but....but...but!!!!.....should be treated as another tool for addressing troubled teens and getting them the therapy and support needed.

    No one "side" need argue who is right or who is more at fault. For the children struggling and the families affected (both biological and adoptive) it's already critical; perhaps the best this study can do is put the spotlight on an issue that can lead to lives being saved! Drawing causal reasons for the underlying problems is important yes in understanding but that alone won't cure a truly suicidal person.

    Thanks!

    Beth

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  20. At this point, as Lorraine's post shows, there are more than ONE study about adoptees and suicide. Something is going on that is pointing the studies in the same direction.

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  21. In 2003, Garrett Lee Smith, the adopted son of then Oregon Senator Gordon Smith, hanged himself the day before his 22nd birthday.

    According to his parents, Garrett was suffering from depression. The fact that he chose the day before his birthday when his sense of having been given away would have been most acute strongly suggests a connection between his adoption and his suicide.

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  22. I almost killed myself once 30 years ago. So glad I didn't. For me it was true that "the darkest hour is just before the dawn"

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  23. I was adopted at 9 years old. I've suffered of depression few weeks after my adoption but it went unnoticed. Two years later, another depression. And then several suicide attempts and depressions since teenage years until I joined an adoptee support group at age 40 years old.

    We only hear about adoptive parents suffering of post-adoption depression (PAD).

    Adoptees suffer of PAD too, for different reasons of course, but society doesn't recognize PAD in adoptees. Untreated PAD can lead to more severe depression and suicide.

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  24. People Magazine, September 16, 2013, Heroes Among Us section, page 66.

    The story is about stopping suicide. Sgt. Kevin Briggs prevented the suicide of a 22 year old man who was about to jump off the Golden Gate Bridge. And why was this young man so despondent that he was ready to take his own life? He had never dealt with his enormous pain over being adopted and not knowing who his real parents are.

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  25. Amazing coincidence, Robin.

    But then, maybe not. Maybe is it all the more common than anyone wants to recognize. Certainly the adoption trauma adds to a person's baggage. I know it did for my daughter.

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  26. I would like to see the data analyzed for causation vs correlation. As an AP, I don't wish suicide on any family. However, to really help solve the issue with actionable and concrete next steps, I think the data is needed to understand the cause of the issues. I will make an analogy. African American Children suffer sexual abuse at a 2 -3X rate vs the general population. That doesn't mean that being African Americans makes you a victim. There are deeper, more salient issues at play. I wonder if we cut the data for all children who felt lost and unloved, how would that look. By cutting in factors that we can then react to, we can build solutions the help mitigate the issue and save more lives while building happy, solid families.

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  27. I think if you cut to the chase of adoptees who feel unwanted and unvloved you are going to find a large cohort to them are adopted. So many of the schools that specliaize in troubled kids are full of adoptees.

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  28. I'm a 44 year old adopted woman. Every birthday I dread as it creeps up. I try to make plans to go away or do something pleasurable but the weight of it all just swamps me. A week ago was my birthday, by five pm I was thinking of hanging myself. It never goes away just gets worse with time. Worse, I push people away before they can abandon me. The depression has lasted this time and that's why I google 'suicide rates of adult adopted children'.

    What makes this sadder for me is that I've overcome a lot. My life was he'll until I was 33 then I turned it all around. But this thing just keeps dragging me back... I think if I saw a therapist it would get worse. I

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  29. Michellina:
    Therapist or not, you do need to talk to someone at length about your feelings about yourself. Perhaps you could find a group in your area?

    Perhaps psychoanalysis is not what your want, but talking and or medication for depression can help. You are not the only person who has felt this low; others have been there. And come back.

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  30. I'm late in commenting, but I personally have to wonder about the medical history of the bio family. You're framing it as an adoptee problem 'because' the person was adopted. I am an adoptee with ADHD and although I do not know my medical history (for certain) there's a strong possibility that my biological mother is afflicted. Furthermore, it does have a genetic link.

    For me, I'm curious to know if this is a biological factor brought on by a genetic link to a mental illness or other ailment, or whether you can tie it to being adopted. In my own situation, I tend to believe many of my bio mother's choices were made largely by impulsivity amongst some other trademark ADHD behaviors.

    I'm not anti-adoption. To be candid, I do t read regularly because I realize many of you need to vent and don't want to hear from the so-called 'happy' adoptees... But on this one, I did want to speak up as human psychology & sociology is an interest and I think it's an interesting topic.

    With that said, I also believe this is an instance in which it's the whole chicken/egg debate to a degree. I'm not suggesting adoptions are problem free & all rainbows, but in this instance, I'm curious as to medical histories, as well as the environments in which children were raised. All is necessary, in my opinion, to draw any significant conclusion.

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  31. Fourth try at commenting:

    You are absolutely right. Genetics could be part of the mix, but with the adoptees biological histories lost in Korea, whose to know?

    Please comment whenever you feel moved to. But you are right, many who comment here are in pain, even though many say they had "good" adoptions.

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  32. This blog is being filled with so many unscientific facts here. I have a great friend who adopted a beautiful baby girl at birth as she was unable to have a child and the birth mother did not want the child. Let me elaborate on this. She was a crack addict who worked as a prostitute to make money. When she finally came out of her fog and realized she was pregnant it was too late for her to have an abortion. Since the bio dad was one of her customers there was no way to turn there as she did not really get first names of these men. Anyway she was still doing drugs and was not really taking care of herself and fully expected the baby to die in her womb. Luckily the little girl survived when the mother went into labor early and delivered him in the back of the ambulance that was called to take her. On the way to the hospital she told the EMT personnel please take that thing away from my sight as she is too ugly and has a big nose.
    Enter my friend who was on the waiting list for a child and was already approved for placement. She was adamant that there be an open adoption so they could keep in touch but the birth mother did not want any part of it. She demanded that they expedite the adoption right away but the judge would not let her do it. He followed all the procedure but the birth mother left the hospital the next day and they had to track her down in crack dens when ever they needed her. Finally the waiting period was over and when it came time for the final waiver she refused the judge's offer to go to rehab and the adoptive mother offer to keep in touch. Her actual words were, "I fully expect to die of a drug overdose one day and I am okay with that. I love the feeling of getting high and would stay high all day if I could. This thing needs to go where it is wanted because it sure as hell is not wanted by me and I don't want to know it at any time so you all do what you gotta do and stay the f**k away from me."
    The police was never able to find her real name as she had never been in trouble and was never arrested for prostitution. She had used an assumed name when she came to the city so no one knew where she came from or if she had any family members. Now fast forward ten years and my friend and her daughter is positively thriving. Her daughter was told the story and she felt sorry for her birth mom but she tells my friend she is so lucky to have her as a mom and would not trade her for anything in the world.
    Update on the birth mom, she has since had four other children who were all placed for adoption when she found that she could get a lot of money from desperate couples seeking newborn white babies. Someone knows her and said she will get her self clean at the appropriate times so when she meets the attorney she looks normal. Although it is illegal to get money for a child she contacts the adoptive parents with a sob story and they fall for it every time and she gets more money in addition to having her medical expenses paid. So now she has had five children placed and she is not yet thirty. I would like someone to tell me how this woman would be considered the first choice to keep these kids since there is no extended family known and she sees them as a commodity who helps her get paid. For in this instance genetic ties means absolutely nothing to her and she could care less about them.

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    Replies
    1. Anon, what's your point? It looks like you used this post as an excuse to rant about adoption.

      We all agree that if a mother cannot care for her child, the child should be placed with someone who can care for her. FMF's concern are those all too frequent cases where mothers can nurture their children but are induced to give them up, unaware of the affect on their children and themselves.

      Please note that the phrased you used in your opening sentence "unscientific facts" is an oxymoron.

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    2. Dear Anonymous: You need to write to all the researchers and PHd and MDs who wrote the papers above. As for me, I'm just a writer who reports and interprets what others publish in journals and as anecdotal incidents in their writings. Oh yes, I will also channel my daughter and tell her that adoption had no part in her suicide, she just became a statistic.

      As will I try to reach the 3 adopted daughters of famous people I happen to know who also killed themselves. Sorry if you don't like the research.

      Delete
  33. I am 42 years old, my parents were married for 21 years, it was in the middle of a bitter divorce that my sister and I learned that our mother had given a daughter up for adoption at the age of 16. My father was not the father of the adoptee.. I never got to meet the sister I never knew we were notified of her suicide days later. This is a topic that needs so much research... Other than families of deceased adoptees lost to suicide coming forward and supporting research, I guess there really is no way of ever knowing what the true number of loved ones lost is?

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