' [Birth Mother] First Mother Forum: Relinquish adoption protections--give the adopted their original records and identity!

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Tuesday, March 18, 2014

Relinquish adoption protections--give the adopted their original records and identity!

Today when Unsealed Imitative is in New York's state capital lobbying for our bills to unseal the original birth records of adoptees, Lorraine has an Oped in the Albany Times-Union. Please leave a comment and let everyone know more than a few voices want those records open. (Note: It appears nearly impossible to leave a comment, many have tried, none have succeeded.)

When I drove into Albany pulling a U-Haul with most of my worldly possessions, I was 23, and I was already on the run from my past. I'd had a child in Rochester and given her up for adoption. Now I was desperate to keep that part of my life secret when I began my new job at the late Knickerbocker News. When the doctor giving me a physical for the company insurance asked if I'd ever been pregnant, I lied and said no. Shame surrounded me like an aura. The year was 1966. In the two years I worked at The Knick, I only revealed my secret to one friend — and then with a racing heart.
Reporter with a secret--and blown kneecap
Read the rest at 
Relinquish adoption protections

The weekend we met in Madison, 1981

Published 5:27 pm, Monday, March 17, 2014


Lorraine now, testifying

My mother, Jane in back, her daughter, Kim, and Lorraine,1995
A few years later in my home town, Sag Harbor

9 comments :

  1. Thank you! Very convincing.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Lorraine, Jane or anybody:

    I need some help. I am in a debate on another board. I wrote that women who lose a child to adoption are seven times more likely to lose a child to adoption themselves. I read that on one of the adoption reform blogs. The person I am posting with has asked for a link. Can someone here provide me with a link to a site that discusses the higher rate of relinquishment among adoptees?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Steve,
    Did you mean that women who are adopted are seven times more likely to lose a child to adoption themselves?

    Anecdotally, it appears that a disproportionate number of first mothers are adoptees. However, I do not recall ever reading that the rate is seven times as high.

    Readers, have you ever seen this statistic?

    ReplyDelete
  4. I miswrote what I intended to say above. I meant to say that women who are adopted are more likely to lose a child to adoption.

    The number I once saw was seven times more likely. I would love to find an article that discusses the statistics.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Steve: I will try to track this one down because I see that I referred to it in 2012 but only that I remember reading it--and I don't have a source. It could be myth but I would bet that the percentage of adoptees who relinquish is much greater than the general population.

    Here's what I wrote in 2012

    I remember one statistic that said that adoptees were seven times more likely than non-adoptees to give up a child for adoption, and I suppose part of the reason is there in the missing link of DNA to the grandparents, and lack of support for keeping the child. They got a child through adoption, so...and the relatives saying of the pregnant teen: she's just like her [real] mother [i.e. a slut], what are we supposed to do, raise this bastard like our own grandchild? If you think I am being harsh here, you haven't been listening to what people actually say...

    'I'm Having Their Baby' turns into 'I'm keeping MY baby'

    ReplyDelete
  6. I thought your article was excellent - so clear and so much covered by it. I tried to leave a comment but couldn't - for some reason I couldn't get registered with them.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Cherry: Apparently everyone was having that problem. Supposedly it was fixed yesterday. If you don't mind, could you try again to register and let me know? I know it is complicated.

    thanks in advance, --lo

    ReplyDelete
  8. I just left a comment, you do have to go through a lot of rigmarole and answer questions about your age and sex and income if you feel like and get an "activation" email and then go back.

    But it does work.

    You will see my "test" comment.
    I think.

    ReplyDelete

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