Comments on [Birth Mother,] First Mother Forum: To understand ourselves, we must know where we cam...

Max Troitsky, a Russian-speaking US Citizen from P...

2012-02-12T09:19:22.770-05:00

Max Troitsky, a Russian-speaking US Citizen from Pennsylvania is in a sad situation. His estranged wife ( Anna Troitsky a.k.a. Anna Demyanyuk ), a US-Russian dual citizen illegally abducted their US-born US-citizen toddler daughter Julie Troitsky in late November 2011, against the US Court Order, and all the details of this bizarre and unfortunate case are here:

He has not had any contact with his daughter for months, and could lead to years, if ever:

http://www.HelpBringJulieHome.com (site in English and Russian)
To raise awareness, please LIKE on Facebook:
http://www.facebook.com/HelpBringJulieHome
and please FOLLOW on Twitter: http://twitter.com/BringJulieHome

Thank you for the help, leads and following of this case... or if you can blog/write a page article on this, Max would appreciate it.

I found out I was black when I met my mother. I a...

2012-01-24T21:53:33.687-05:00

I found out I was black when I met my mother. I am blonde with blue eyes. My mother's father was a light skinned black man who "passed" as white. I had always wondered why I didn't get as sunburned as the other kids! I nearly hit the floor when she told me that! I did know there was something different about my skin color. I used to tell my a mom that I was green. Mom & Dad didn't tell Spence Chapin the whole truth, they said I was Italian! I don't think a mom would've touched me with a 10 ft pole if she had known the truth. I'm so happy I found out. I'm proud of who I really am.

Growing up with people we look like also helps a c...

2012-01-24T19:07:13.528-05:00

Growing up with people we look like also helps a child to know where s/he comes from. Different ethnicities carry different physical traits. When a child grows up with his bio-family these shared characteristics give him a sense of belonging and a connectedness to his roots.

2012-01-23T10:41:57.143-05:00

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swm, To start the search process, check out the w...

2012-01-22T23:04:41.860-05:00

swm,

To start the search process, check out the websites of the American Adoption Congress and Bastard Nation. These sites give you tips as well as information about local search groups.

Register with the free International Soundex Reunion Registry.

Contact the agency that handled your adoption.

Obtain your original birth certificate, available in Maine, New Hampshire, Rhode Island, Delaware, Alabama, Tennessee, Illinois, Kansas, Oregon, and Alaska.

Good luck!

I am an adopted woman who is interested in finding...

2012-01-22T21:45:51.239-05:00

I am an adopted woman who is interested in finding out about her birth mother. How do I start this process?

Just to Clarify, Agnes (the first picture shown) i...

2012-01-22T18:44:10.922-05:00

Just to Clarify, Agnes (the first picture shown) is the one who left her husband; Bronslawa is the one who wrote letters to the paper. I guess I will make it clearer in the post.

ITA? I had to look it up....I totally agree...

Thanks, Robin, about my mother. Oddly enough we were not close when I was young--my brother told me recently that she was always saying to him, Lorraine pushes me away...and I know it is true. It was because I did not want to be a housewife. Later on, however, I realized how much she helped me go to and finish college, and supported me when I needed that. When I was finally, er, me, we became very very close. And when I went public with my story and later published Birthmark she supported me all the way, even though I know she had to deal with the gossiping of the women of her generation who lived alongside her in the senior housing apartment she spent the last two decades of her life.

She died 12 years ago, and I still think of her and miss her greatly.

ITA with the title of this post. There is a lot of...

2012-01-22T13:18:04.022-05:00

ITA with the title of this post. There is a lot of science and there have been many posts about how attached the child is to his first mother at birth. How a baby knows his own mother, etc. I agree with all of this but I also feel that the 9 months in utero is only a drop in the bucket. We are also connected to all of our ancestors through our bloodlines on both sides.

Your grandmother, Lorraine, was a very stong woman to leave her husband in a time when that just wasn't done. Maybe that is where you got your strength to come out publicly as a first mother and to share your very personal story in a book. I don't think these types of traits are coincidence.

I think one of the most interesting examples of this is seeing Gwyneth Paltrow on the show "Who do you think you are?". The actress has long been known for her interest in Kaballah and it turns out that one of her distant ancestors on her father's side was a highly respected Rabbi who was renowned for his study of Kaballah. Ms. Paltrow had no knowledge of this prior to being on the show.

Btw, that's a lovely smile in your yearbook photo. I can see the resemblance between you and your mother. I have always liked and admired your mother based on everything you've said about her.

Lorraine, Absolutely, wonderful pictures of your...

2012-01-22T09:41:48.639-05:00

Lorraine,

Absolutely, wonderful pictures of your Family. I have to salute, Bronislawa, she did something many women didn't do and still don't do stand up for what is right and get rid of the wrong i.e. Molester.
Too many women have lived with abusers all their lives because they need the security of the abuser. The molested child is just supposed to "get over it" sounds
so familiar.

Thanks--I will admit I enjoyed posting pictures of...

2012-01-21T12:55:49.795-05:00

Thanks--I will admit I enjoyed posting pictures of my ancestors. I love that my printer is a scanner, makes this all possible.

Lorraine, Your family photos are awesome!! How can...

2012-01-21T12:05:44.923-05:00

Lorraine,
Your family photos are awesome!! How can anyone think that robbing a child of their real identity and sealing it away forever can ever be "In the chlds best interest"?

My found daughter says.. I don't think I would...

2012-01-21T10:32:46.227-05:00

My found daughter says.. I don't think I would have done anything I've done in the last five years without meeting you and finding me.

Thank you Lorraine! I am getting weary again of h...

2012-01-21T09:22:42.731-05:00

Thank you Lorraine! I am getting weary again of hearing "Don't think about it", "Get over it", "It doesn't matter", in regards to being adopted. It does, and it is huge knowing who you are and where you come from.

Blogger is acting up - from theadoptedones... Bea...

2012-01-20T16:27:39.121-05:00

Blogger is acting up - from theadoptedones...

Beautiful post. I have spent so much time figuring out who my ancestors really were by where they came from, what they did, the struggles they would have had to endure and overcome down to those still living and who they are. It provides such a deeper level of understanding why I am the way I am coupled with the influences mom and dad provided as well.

Definitely! My family were Society of Friends.......

2012-01-20T14:26:54.379-05:00

Definitely! My family were Society of Friends.... railroad engineers - as in building trains - and a thousand other things. My great grandfather was a famous explorer and guide.... His wife was a woman with quiet dignity, writer and hostess to some of the most famous names in history (cir. 1915 - 1945+/- a few years). Those included Zane Gray and Theodore Roosevelt.

Being who you are doesn't begin with you, it begins in the very beginning of everyone that came before you!