tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post5084996300519224075..comments2024-03-27T20:48:39.389-04:00Comments on [Birth Mother] First Mother Forum: Frank talk about adoption with my relinquished daughter, Part 3Lorraine Duskyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18285341379272250245noreply@blogger.comBlogger19125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-34283556824721195652011-09-06T15:32:06.120-04:002011-09-06T15:32:06.120-04:00Kristi: Egads, thanks. I've got more of the c...Kristi: Egads, thanks. I've got more of the conversation coming.Lorraine Duskyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18285341379272250245noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-9963245160830951852011-09-06T14:51:40.972-04:002011-09-06T14:51:40.972-04:00So beautiful, Lorraine - the story and the photo. ...So beautiful, Lorraine - the story and the photo. She looks just like you!Jenniferhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06366141565010190668noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-53308770257335362482011-09-05T09:45:13.737-04:002011-09-05T09:45:13.737-04:00Beautiful and I’m sure very treasured picture of y...Beautiful and I’m sure very treasured picture of your daughter, Jane and granddaughter.<br /><br /> Thank you so much for sharing the conversations that you had with your daughter.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-68509890315196884162011-09-04T12:46:23.662-04:002011-09-04T12:46:23.662-04:00right... I was confused by the dates mentioned. T...right... I was confused by the dates mentioned. Thank you so much for sharing these recordings. It is amazing to me that there is so much in what Jane felt and understood that is so similar to what I did/do and I am old enough to be her mother... all these years between us and nothing has changed for us. Blessings on you Lo.CullyRaynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-29741356907181681412011-09-04T12:13:05.758-04:002011-09-04T12:13:05.758-04:00"Mark" was Jane's adopted brother an..."Mark" was Jane's adopted brother and he did not die; a biological son died, and this conversation was well before that. or Jane's marriage. I know it must be confusing--coming here as it does in snippets. So I write the book...Lorraine Duskyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18285341379272250245noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-35481694946002196532011-09-04T12:00:14.286-04:002011-09-04T12:00:14.286-04:00Lo... was this conversation after Mark died?Lo... was this conversation after Mark died?CullyRaynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-48032901215275395882011-09-04T09:27:23.239-04:002011-09-04T09:27:23.239-04:00Lorraine,
Janes having been able to be so painful...Lorraine,<br /><br />Janes having been able to be so painfully honset with you is beautiful. I am glad she could talk to you this way.<br />Funny, how much of what she says is so much like our own feelings of losing our children.Janetnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-63635369281658673272011-09-04T08:15:17.674-04:002011-09-04T08:15:17.674-04:00Lorraine, thanks for sharing.Lorraine, thanks for sharing.Meganhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16524888517035539671noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-30608763988669566052011-09-03T22:49:46.212-04:002011-09-03T22:49:46.212-04:00Robin: Her father and I were convinced that "...Robin: Her father and I were convinced that "she" would be a boy, and naming the child never came up. Maybe because it was from such a different era, even though many women did name their children. I felt I had no right to name her. My daughter was a premie, weighed under five pounds and that was considered really dangerous at the time, and so a priest came in within minutes after I woke up--I was pretty hysterical at the time. My social worker who was, in a sense, there for me because no one else was, asked-with the priest at the foot of the bed--if I had a name. I did not.<br /><br />Was Mary okay the priest suggested? (Naturally.)<br /><br />Yes. I said. Yes. <br /><br />Her adoptive mother's name was Mary. They may or may not have known about the Mary as the baptismal name, and I don't know if the name is on the original birth certificate. If I had named her I think I would have chosen Sarah. However, when I chose a fictional name for a girl her age when I wrote <i>Birthmark</i>, it was Jennifer, the name of the daughter of the young man I almost married, and that is the name of his daughter. <br /><br />If you remember reading my "Alternative Universe Daughter," blog post, Jennifer, five months older than my daughter would be, is now someone I am very very close to. She has been a real light in my life. I have kinda "adopted" her and her family, and she me. It is truly a blessing.Lorraine Duskyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18285341379272250245noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-70474572694238185182011-09-03T22:44:39.890-04:002011-09-03T22:44:39.890-04:00Poignant. Jane's image of the owl, her forming...Poignant. Jane's image of the owl, her forming a circle with her hands. Perhaps a writer lived in her, too.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-6222036825680829362011-09-03T18:39:26.746-04:002011-09-03T18:39:26.746-04:00Lorraine,
Just wondering, what were you going to n...Lorraine,<br />Just wondering, what were you going to name Jane?Robinnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-887411527593751932011-09-03T17:59:51.098-04:002011-09-03T17:59:51.098-04:00Cully Ray:
I was surprised at my daughter's q...Cully Ray:<br /><br />I was surprised at my daughter's quick reaction to my comment about the family photo. Her mother had reddish blonde hair and Jane's was that color in this big formal family shot. And her a mom is Scottish or Irish and Jane's bio dad was Irish, very very Irish. <br /><br />loLorraine Duskyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18285341379272250245noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-81715975667138220152011-09-03T17:53:26.390-04:002011-09-03T17:53:26.390-04:00Thanks, Maryanne. It was a hard life she had.Thanks, Maryanne. It was a hard life she had.Lorraine Duskyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18285341379272250245noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-75723038325191649322011-09-03T14:54:13.701-04:002011-09-03T14:54:13.701-04:00just two observations from my perspective - Jane w...just two observations from my perspective - Jane was right on when it came to how her (most) adoptive parents (especially a-Moms)felt/feel, and re "the family portrait" - we (adoptees) see what we feel. At times we see a family portrait and at other times we see different people gathered together.CullyRaynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-26434273553633866772011-09-03T13:30:49.611-04:002011-09-03T13:30:49.611-04:00Poor Jane. What a hard life, and her epilepsy must...Poor Jane. What a hard life, and her epilepsy must have been severe if she had to wear a helmet to school. Kids can be so cruel. May she rest in peace.maryannenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-39162651994806913462011-09-03T13:03:18.064-04:002011-09-03T13:03:18.064-04:00I *love* this picture, Lorraine.I *love* this picture, Lorraine.Melyndahttp://www.letterstomsfeverfew.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-60759974911181014132011-09-03T08:29:47.630-04:002011-09-03T08:29:47.630-04:00She was teased because of the epilepsy; I don'...She was teased because of the epilepsy; I don't think adoption was part of being bothered by other kids. Having to wear a hockey helmet to school to several years is one hell of a way to be a kid. <br /><br />Yes, it is amazing how much she was like me and also her biological father, Patrick. I could see so many of his characteristics in her.Lorraine Duskyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18285341379272250245noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-40297590163663726212011-09-03T07:36:51.859-04:002011-09-03T07:36:51.859-04:00Was your daughter teased because of her epilepsy, ...Was your daughter teased because of her epilepsy, because of being adopted or both?<br /><br />I was intriqued about your describing Jane's smoking and liking to hang in bars. Isn't it amazing how much we are like are parents even when they didn't raise us?Robinnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-42913824211863744732011-09-03T00:35:27.479-04:002011-09-03T00:35:27.479-04:00So honest... I am a bit jealous.So honest... I am a bit jealous.Lorihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05815710859859029536noreply@blogger.com