tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post5468869617596090676..comments2024-03-27T20:48:39.389-04:00Comments on [Birth Mother] First Mother Forum: Adopted from Romania, told her mother was dead, reunited via Facebook Lorraine Duskyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18285341379272250245noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-36853415418132218882014-12-11T11:34:55.476-05:002014-12-11T11:34:55.476-05:00Robin, I absolutely agree with you that for some c...Robin, I absolutely agree with you that for some children, family preservation is not an option and, in fact, would be detrimental to them. This is the case for our son, he would have been very unsafe with his biological family (not just his bio parents, but extended family as well). <br /><br />In Nina's case, I think Rayna has the intention and ability to keep her daughter safe, she just needs a lot of support to do so. With the right support system, I feel that family preservation is a viable route for Nina. I am hoping that Rayna is getting that support from her brother.Jay Iyerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01592280612055255470noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-73596375699038222812014-12-06T12:57:25.044-05:002014-12-06T12:57:25.044-05:00Jay,
First of all, I want you to know that I would...Jay,<br />First of all, I want you to know that I would never say anything to try to make you feel bad or feel guilty about any of the choices you have made. But do keep in mind that I write from the perspective of that vulnerable child. My pov is a little different than some family preservationists because I don't believe that adoption is unnecessary 99.9% of the time. There are some situations where adoption can be a blessing to the child. Some of the things you wrote about Rayna and Nina's situation alarmed me. As I wrote in a comment to Mya, if a parent is going to raise the child s/he must be able to do so. <br /><br />You have a good heart, Ms. Iyer, and I know it will always lead you in the right direction. You are an angel in Nina's life.Robinnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-13812435985474108272014-12-06T08:29:09.021-05:002014-12-06T08:29:09.021-05:00Thanks for sharing. I visited Andreea's blog ...Thanks for sharing. I visited Andreea's blog and read quite a bit about her story. Her positive attitude and outlook on life is refreshing and uplifting. I felt inspired and actually in awe. I'm planning on making a donation to help further her efforts and would encourage everyone to give this some thought if they're looking for ways to help others in need this Christmas season. Gailnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-23696264235948519632014-12-06T02:56:32.940-05:002014-12-06T02:56:32.940-05:00Wow, Robin, this article bowled me over too!
Ro...Wow, Robin, this article bowled me over too! <br /><br />Robin, on a different note, I want to say that your comment stating that I should have adopted Nina or at least continued to foster her really penetrated my heart and soul. For many months now, I have been tormented by thoughts that maybe, just maybe, in my zeal to do right by Rayna, I did not fight hard enough to make sure Nina has the stability she deserves. <br /><br />Last Christmas, Nina and my son asked Santa to please let Nina live with us forever. Obviously, that wish did not come true. While I still cannot imagine myself as Nina's legal mother, I believe I need to keep watching out for her, proactively, knowing Rayna's limitations. So, your comment pushed me to contact her family members for a face-to-face meeting in a couple weeks. I just want them to know I haven't gone away, and I haven't stopped caring very deeply about Nina's well-being. I would never fight Rayna for her daughter, but I want her family to know that I want Nina's happiness and stability with every ounce of my being, and I am available to help with that in any way I can.<br /><br />At first your comment made me feel defensive because in many ways my hands are tied in regards to helping Nina. But on introspection I felt I should at the very least get the message to her family that I am not just sitting back and waiting to hear from them about Nina, that I in fact worry about her daily and want them to know I am here for her, always. Thank you for spurring me to act.Jay Iyerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01592280612055255470noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-70461574515131693432014-12-05T20:25:39.227-05:002014-12-05T20:25:39.227-05:00Thanks, Lorraine, for writing about Romania adopti...Thanks, Lorraine, for writing about Romania adoptions. <br /><br />Another great reference is Roelie Post's book, "Romania: For Export Only - The Untold Story of the Romanian 'Orphans'". She writes about her detailed work with Romania's children. An amazing job, by an amazing, amazing woman who has done so much for children and their families.Kymnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-11251600091831845252014-12-05T16:07:11.787-05:002014-12-05T16:07:11.787-05:00This is somewhat off topic but I remember reading ...This is somewhat off topic but I remember reading that actress Angelina Jolie was told by the adoption agency that her adopted daughter Zahara's first mother was deceased. The U.K.'s Daily Mail uncovered the story that she was as alive as you and I. I was bowled over by the picture of Z's natural mother. Mother and daughter look exactly alike.<br /><br />http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-496176/Why-did-adoption-agency-tell-Angelina-Jolie-I-died-AIDS-gave-baby.htmlRobinnoreply@blogger.com