tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post5382082316672858965..comments2024-03-27T20:48:39.389-04:00Comments on [Birth Mother] First Mother Forum: Advertising for a baby to adopt on Facebook Lorraine Duskyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18285341379272250245noreply@blogger.comBlogger125125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-22229204288830634002013-11-19T14:42:30.774-05:002013-11-19T14:42:30.774-05:00@Myst
"That counts infant adoption OUT incide...@Myst<br />"That counts infant adoption OUT incidentally because a baby in his/her mother's womb is NOT available and seeking to separate a mother and her child so early is plain wrong."<br />What do you suggest should be done for newborns abandoned or left in hospitals by mothers who refuse to have anything more to do them? It happens.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-32446169359676448922013-11-04T07:58:13.564-05:002013-11-04T07:58:13.564-05:00Anonymous, you know perfectly well that's not ...Anonymous, you know perfectly well that's not what Jane is saying. <br /><br />Stop with the martyr act, please. <br /><br /> cdcbdb (or whatever)noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-50553012384562149572013-11-03T18:40:12.782-05:002013-11-03T18:40:12.782-05:00That's right Jane biological parents are all p...That's right Jane biological parents are all perfect they never abuse or neglect their children. It's never their fault their children end up in Foster care. It's those evil adopters who are the bad parents.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-64355962922263343192013-11-02T16:29:09.787-04:002013-11-02T16:29:09.787-04:00Atheist Adopter wrote:
"If there were no &quo...Atheist Adopter wrote:<br />"If there were no "irresponsible BIRTHmothers" (or biological parents if you prefer) there would be very few children in the foster care system." <br /><br />Children go into foster care for many reasons, not always related related to parental irresponsibility. These include: over zealous social workers, poverty due to the poor economy, a parent's illness, a child's disability because states provide help to children in foster care that they do not provide to natural parents. <br /><br />AA goes on to say: "My view is that if a child is going to end up in the foster care system or adopted as an older child, its much better for that child to be adopted as an infant instead (assuming of course the adopters are fit to parent."<br /><br />There is no way to know for sure which children will eventually go into foster care. The domestic infant adoption system is arbitrary. It does not select children born with risk factors for future foster care; those whose parents use drugs, have low intelligence, are criminals, or are mentally ill are not desired by those seeking to adopt. The industry markets to women who meet desired standards, healthy, non-drinkers, non-smokers, college students, and so on. Many of these parents would do a fine job of raising their children.Jane Edwardshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09715622112694146946noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-44443310988599707452013-11-02T13:57:56.470-04:002013-11-02T13:57:56.470-04:00"Satan, or so they call me"
If there w..."Satan, or so they call me" <br /><br />If there were no "irresponsible BIRTHmothers" (or biological parents if you prefer) there would be very few children in the foster care system. <br /><br />There are plenty of women who have had several children and (for whatever reason) are not raising any of them. My view is that if a child is going to end up in the foster care system or adopted as an older child, its much better for that child to be adopted as an infant instead (assuming of course the adopters are fit to parent).<br /><br />Atheist Adopternoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-9065035541643780472013-10-31T10:02:11.232-04:002013-10-31T10:02:11.232-04:00No one said they didn't welcome Atheists comme...No one said they didn't welcome Atheists comments, Lorraine. <br /><br />@Athiest- <br />"As for her birth mother, she seems to prefer to leave the raising of her many children to others."<br /><br />Yeah we know, those "irresponsible", horrid BIRTHmothers. <br /><br />Satan, or so they call menoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-85564234781421797112013-10-30T06:34:40.029-04:002013-10-30T06:34:40.029-04:00Absolutely right, Robin. I'd never thought of ...Absolutely right, Robin. I'd never thought of that but it's so obviously true.cherrynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-51638426638313418272013-10-30T03:37:39.576-04:002013-10-30T03:37:39.576-04:00"Robin said...
Any counseling that tells eac..."Robin said... <br />Any counseling that tells each woman the same exact thing is not counseling at all. It is a sales pitch."<br /><br />Exactly Robin. <br /><br />One thing one notices when one reads things like the Missing Piece and the NCFA schemes is that the woman's intrinsic qualities are irrelevant. The ONLY relevant factor is her UNPLANNED pregnancy and this very factor is used against her at every opportunity. <br /><br />Because she hadn't planned to become pregnant, it is made clear to her that she can't be as good a parent as someone who has been planning for a while (which includes most adoptive couples). Not only that, *we the adoptees* are the ones who are used to sell that message - eg "Children deserve parents who have been planning for them for a long time". In fact, most counselling uses "Us babies" as the main people wanting adoption. <br /><br />In the Missing Piece, they say the following:<br /><br />**********<br />"EMPHASIZE THE DIFFICULTIES OF PARENTING<br />In the training sessions for counselors, the long-term problems of parenting for those who<br />are not prepared for parenthood must be emphasized. For example, address the fact that women who keep babies they do not really want are much more likely to neglect or injure them. While children may have been saved from abortion, by staying with unprepared mothers, they may very well live lives of pain and suffering. <br /><br />In addition, training materials should explain that women, too, suffer when they keep children they are not prepared to raise. Besides having their own opportunities cut short,<br />these women face a much higher possibility of living in poverty. <br /><br />Because of their poverty, mothers may be forced to stay in abusive situations. When they do so, their<br />children are endangered.<br />If counselors are to present adoption, they must be trained to look beyond immediate victories of abortions prevented to what some of these victories mean for both mothers and children. Otherwise, they may only be saving babies to have them suffer and return<br />to the clinic themselves as adults.<br />***********<br /><br />The above paragraphs outline part of the issue I have with these programs - they are assuming that unplanned always means unwanted. They seem to assume that it isn't possible for a woman with anunplanned pregnancy to actually PREPARE for the pregnancy. <br /><br />They also make sure that the person with the unplanned pregnancy *realises* that parenting is always selfish purely because of it being unplanned. <br /><br />It doesn't help that we always here talk about "unwanted pregnancies". Once a woman decides to continue a pregnancy, is it is still "an unwanted pregnancy"? <br /><br />Perhaps this is where "positive language" could work - once a woman has decided to continue a pregnancy, from then on, instead of keeping on using "UNWANTED pregnancy", why not use "pregnancy in UNWANTED circumstances". Then the emphasis is on seeing what one can do about circumstances first. <br /><br />The one thing both the MP and NCFA say is this:<br /><br />"Adoption advocacy should not be positioned against abortion. In the psychology that drives decisions about adoption, adoption really does not compete with abortion; it is competing with the emotionally compelling alternative of parenting the child."<br /><br />This goes to prove the point that they are selling adoption - they know they are competing with parenting so they need to make sure that the pregnant client believes that parenting their own child will cause psychological damage to that child purely because of their pregnancy being unplanned - regardless of their intrinsic qualities.cdcbcnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-21613333636646825622013-10-29T19:01:35.609-04:002013-10-29T19:01:35.609-04:00Any counseling that tells each woman the same exac...Any counseling that tells each woman the same exact thing is not counseling at all. It is a sales pitch.Robinnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-50171215429760773922013-10-29T18:07:23.699-04:002013-10-29T18:07:23.699-04:00I came across this blog years ago where the blogge...I came across this blog years ago where the blogger has commented on the NCFA program and thought "surely she is making it up, a program like that can't exist":<br /><br />http://reformadoption.com/Advocacy/main.shtmlcdcbcnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-34155935829272837392013-10-29T17:54:57.895-04:002013-10-29T17:54:57.895-04:00"And thank you CDCBC for pointing out what NC..."And thank you CDCBC for pointing out what NCFA is up to: Counselors must be trained to give women sound reasons that will counter the desire to keep their babies. Counselors must be trained to give women sound reasons that will counter the desire to keep their babies. One example is to reinforce the notion that it takes a strong, mature woman to place a child for adoption." <br /><br />I thought I'd better make it clear that the above is actually from "The Missing Piece - Adoption counseling in Pregnancy Resource Centers" from 1999 but one can see its direct influence in the NCFA birthmother training program which is designed on vulnerable women as one can see from the list above.cdcbcnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-49161002575452858252013-10-29T11:12:17.182-04:002013-10-29T11:12:17.182-04:00Thank you, Myst: "...adoption is not a servic...Thank you, Myst: <b>"...adoption is not a service for building families and if one wants to adopt, they need to focus on the children who are actually available for adoption."</b><br /><br />And thank you CDCBC for pointing out what NCFA is up to: Counselors must be trained to give women sound reasons that will counter the desire to keep their babies. <b>Counselors must be trained to give women sound reasons that will counter the desire to keep their babies. One example is to reinforce the notion that it takes a strong, mature woman to place a child for adoption.</b> <br /><br />Against that kind of brainwashing, it takes a strong individual to decide to KEEP her OWN BABY. What is so pathetic about NCFA is that since it is about ADOPTION, the public has the impression it is some do-good organization, when it actually is a fucking lobby group designed to improve the business of adoption agencies, for profit, even if they have non-profit status! They are run by people who have found a business niche is separating infants from their natural parents. <br /><br />Pathetic. Sickening. Immoral.<br /><br />And atheist, I welcome your comments. They are honest and refreshing. Sign me--agnostic. Lorraine Duskyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18285341379272250245noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-22064997969365020092013-10-29T06:05:10.430-04:002013-10-29T06:05:10.430-04:00Some encouraging news:
Illinois files 'histori...Some encouraging news:<br />Illinois files 'historic' lawsuit against for-profit adoption agency<br />http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/local/ct-met-adoption-lawsuit-20131029,0,7147033.storyAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-19736981332563016962013-10-29T03:24:00.669-04:002013-10-29T03:24:00.669-04:00I'm sure you've seen this before Jane but ...I'm sure you've seen this before Jane but for those who haven't, this is the online training scheme:<br /><br />https://www.adoptioncouncil.org/training/birthparent-counseling-training.html<br /><br />Registration just involves a valid email. <br /><br />As for the "in person" training, here is more information: <br /><br /> http://www.infantadopt.org/<br /><br />As you can see from the following list, it is for non-adoption social workers:<br /><br />"Who is Eligible?<br />Individuals employed in the following areas are also eligible to attend a training in their state: <br /><br />State and County Health Department professionals <br />School nurses <br />Crisis Pregnancy Centers <br />State Department of Social Services professionals <br />Hospital nurses <br />Title X Clinics <br />Family Planning Clinics <br />Migrant Health Services <br />Staff from OB/GYN Clinics <br />Staff from Primary Care Clinics <br />Indian Health Services staff <br />Urban Indian Health staff <br />Abstinence programs <br />Health Care staff from youth and adult correctional facilities <br />Health Care staff from group care facilities & residential treatment centers <br />Planned Parenthood <br />Military Health Services <br />Foster Care <br />Public Housing <br />College Campus Health Services <br />Rape and Domestic Violence Crisis Centers <br />Domestic Violence Shelters"<br /><br />And for the "ungratefuls" amongst us (including me :)) - a reminder that adoption is THE most wonderful thing that could EVER have happened in our ungrateful little lives!!!: <br /><br />"Since our founding 31 years ago, approximately three million adoptions have occurred in this country – including all domestic adoptions that take place annually. NCFA's Adoption Factbook includes a comprehensive report on all adoption statistics. Through adoption, these children have enjoyed the love and security that come with having parents and families of their own.<br /><br />Approximately 22,000 infants are adopted annually through domestic infant adoption – a figure we believe is low considering the profoundly positive impact adoption has on our nation. After all, adoption is a positive for all members of the triad; infants placed for adoption grow up in a loving family, birthparents who are not ready to parent are given the opportunity to move forward with their lives with the assurance that their children have stable, loving, and permanent families, and adoptive parents open their hearts and homes to a child and are able to experience the endless joys of parenthood. In the end, our whole society benefits from adoption, allowing children to mature with much better socioeconomic and behavioral outcomes that they otherwise would not have had."cdcbcnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-76777956633604876162013-10-29T01:01:09.513-04:002013-10-29T01:01:09.513-04:00Thanks cdcbc for the information about coercive co...Thanks cdcbc for the information about coercive counseling. Sadly these tactics, designed to overcome a mother's natural resistance to giving up her baby, are all too common.Jane Edwardshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09715622112694146946noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-47332893687922902492013-10-28T23:40:06.099-04:002013-10-28T23:40:06.099-04:00This is the predecessor to today’s Infant Awarenes...This is the predecessor to today’s Infant Awareness Training counselling programs provided by the NCFA – programs which are designed to be used by NON-ADOPTION social workers to encourage them to “consider” adoption. In fact, you can do the program yourself if you go to the NCFA’s page. <br /><br />http://www.heartbeatinternational.org/pdf/missing_piece.pdf<br /><br />This is an excerpt:<br /><br />"OVERCOME OBJECTIONS AND STEREOTYPES<br />Counselors must be trained to give women sound reasons that will counter the desire to<br />keep their babies. One example is to reinforce the notion that it takes a strong, mature<br />woman to place a child for adoption. Arguments about financial survival can be<br />compelling as well. Counselors must communicate that adoption can be the heroic,<br />responsible choice and that the child benefits tremendously. Counselors must be<br />immersed in the mindset of women who selected adoptive families, and understand the<br />rational and emotional motivators and barriers that affect what these women did. At the<br />very least, we believe as a matter of course that counselors best suited to address issues of<br />parenting and adoption are women who have children."<br /><br />The NCFA will be the first to admit that their aim is to “increase adoption” – not for the child, not for the expectant mother but because there are many people who wish to adopt a newborn and at present it is “too hard”. <br /><br />The "best type" of expectant mother from an AP point of view is one that can be encouraged to “surrender her child out of love” so a program was designed aimed specifically at encouraging those women who are really trying to do the best they can. <br /><br />Does that mean every first mother wanted to parent? Not necessarily. But directive counselling programs confuse the issues so much that for those of you have adopted from DIA, how would you know when and how your child's first mother came to their decision? Can any of you truly say that your child’s bparent wasn’t exposed to this type of counseling?cdcbc (ailcdac)noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-48769903384648037382013-10-28T23:37:00.244-04:002013-10-28T23:37:00.244-04:00"Anonymous said...
Look, the bottom line is ..."Anonymous said... <br />Look, the bottom line is YOU<br />(birth mothers and adoptees who hate adoption) NEED to PREACH to other birth parent who donot want to step to the plate and be parents!<br /><br />Today's birth parent are not the young, poor teens of yesterday. Instead, they are full grown adults, with children already, who don't want the responsibility of parenting a newborn. Its a fact, see the statistics of the age of the average birth parent. Many of them are in college or working adults and do not want the responsibility."<br /><br />When a women with an unplanned pregnancy decides to continue her pregnancy and seeks advice on her options, she deserves to be treated in a holistic way with both her intrinsic self and her extrinsic circumstances taken into acocunt and addressed. She needs to be able to make the decision about her unborn child's future in as an uncompromised position as possible. She does not deserve to be subject to directive counselling which is aimed specifically at getting her to "consider adoption". <br /><br />We would all be up in arms if directive counselling was used in any other circumstances. For example, if any of us had a young just out of the closet gay friend who went to a psychologist because he was trying to come to terms with being gay and that psychologist decided to exploit the young mans feelings and guided him into undergoing conversion therapy. <br /><br />We would also be shocked if a couple having marriage difficulties and went to a marriage counsellor and the counsellor pushed the option of divorce on them. <br /><br />However, we just sit back and allow women with unplanned pregnancies to be subjected to directive counselling, which encourages the client to chose adoption by presenting that as the only option a "selfless" woman would make - the natural fears that a woman may have about their child and how they might provide for the child's future are not addressed but exploited.cdcbc (ailcdac)noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-46636702661662772552013-10-28T23:04:32.582-04:002013-10-28T23:04:32.582-04:00"What you seem to find difficult to grasp is ..."What you seem to find difficult to grasp is that no-one is actually telling you to adopt from foster care - what they are saying is that if one wants to adopt, one should adopt ethically and, for many of us, fostering/adopting is the only ethical way to adopt.<br /><br />Perhaps it might help if one used the analogy of getting a pet. If someone said to many of us "I'm planning on getting a pedigree pup from the local puppy mill", many of us would probably say "why not get a dog from a pound or get a rescue greyhound" or something like that. It is about taking the most ethical approach when deciding on doing something."<br /><br />YES!! Thank you as this whole discussion has gotten way out of hand! You nailed it!!<br /><br />I find it hilarious that suddenly because someone suggests adopting a child in NEED to someone who is SEEKING to adopt a child is told that because they (the person suggesting) haven't adopted a child in need are selfish. UM WTF??? That isn't even logical and neither does it make sense. I wouldn't adopt if a person paid me or an older child requested it (like over 18 years of age). And even then I would find that difficult. And most people here who wouldn't adopt would not do so because they are NOT selfish. What is selfish,, what is extremely selfish and self serving, is ignoring the multitude of children who need a home and need real care and nurturing. If those seeking to adopt are unable to adopt them for whatever reason (including the fact they are unsuitable for the child's needs) then they actually shouldn't be adopting AT ALL. Sorry but one thing that keeps getting shoved away is the simple fact that one should not go and adopt a child simply because they want to build a family. Adoption is "supposed" to be about the child which means actively seeking out an expectant mother and telling her you wish to adopt her as yet unborn child is quite simply, unacceptable and NOT about the child but the adults' needs.<br /><br />The ONLY reason adoption from foster care was mentioned was because this couple say they want to adopt ethically (impossible in infant adoption) and they are actively seeking. Otherwise no one would be suggesting anything.<br /><br />And frankly, I don't believe people who want a child and can't have one should be seeking to adopt because adoption doesn't fix the issues or grief that come with not being able to have a child. So no one is saying go and adopt a child from foster care and quit wallowing, they are simply saying that adoption is not a service for building families and if one wants to adopt, they need to focus on the children who are actually available for adoption. That counts infant adoption OUT incidentally because a baby in his/her mother's womb is NOT available and seeking to separate a mother and her child so early is plain wrong.<br />Mysthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07425550479815459790noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-41639702226954016142013-10-28T22:50:58.184-04:002013-10-28T22:50:58.184-04:00"Satan, or so they call me said..."
Sor..."Satan, or so they call me said..."<br /><br />Sorry to hear you were conned by a couple of religious fundies. As you have no doubt realized as this point, religion is a huge fraud.<br /><br />As for our daughter, I am doing my best to raise her as an atheist but she will ultimately believe whatever she wants to believe. Right now she does enjoy playing "find the bible" when we stay in a hotel. <br /><br />As for her birth mother, she seems to prefer to leave the raising of her many children to others. <br /><br />Atheist Adopternoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-44336817367942520202013-10-28T21:37:38.034-04:002013-10-28T21:37:38.034-04:00Anonymous said...
"Donor gametes, Donor Embry... Anonymous said...<br />"Donor gametes, Donor Embryo and Surrogacy are options as well."<br /><br />"Donor or surrogate anything freaks them out. They are very traditional when it comes to pregnancy."<br /><br />Yes it does "freak us out" the adoptee in me screams at the total selfishness of a person whose only quest in there life is to "cure" themselves by becoming "mommy and daddy" at any cost and not giving a hoot about the person that makes them mommy and daddy....what freaks me out more is the idiocy of the people who "donate" (for money that is) who don't realize they are "donating" their own children. what a stupid, entitled, unable to not deal with disappointment society we have become.<br /><br />All these really dumb people see is a cute little baby that they can have baby showers for, join the ranks of soccer moms and baseball coaches and ft in with their friends who have children. And talk about how their children are the center of their lives and how much they love them UNTIL that ungrateful child wants to know where they came from...THEN they wail about the unfairness of it all...or better yet not love them enough to tell them the truth about their beginnings and start in life...or tell them to be thankful their alive...just shut up and be thankful.<br /><br />I don't think they see or care that this person that has made them mommy and daddy is really not biologically theirs and just may have needs that go way beyond mommy and daddy needs after all they are just their to fulfill the needs of the adults.<br /><br />I seriously don't care about someones traditional or non traditional pregnancy...obviously thats ALL you care about...I care about the person created and their needs.<br /><br />Just like I care about the children that have lost their biology...no matter how bad they may seem to the on so perfect people of the world to adoption.<br /><br />the world we have created of entitlment and have a baby no matter what is a scary world...dpennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-52992641192969569462013-10-28T20:35:00.937-04:002013-10-28T20:35:00.937-04:00"It is one thing to tell someone to NOT do so..."It is one thing to tell someone to NOT do something unethical.<br /><br />It is something else to demand that someone must DO a specific action, such as adoption or fostering. <br /><br />You are being obnoxious if you tell someone to have a baby. You are being obnoxious if you tell someone to adopt or foster. You are being obnoxious if you tell someone to abort. Why are these difficult concepts to grasp?" <br /><br />What you seem to find difficult to grasp is that no-one is actually telling you to adopt from foster care - what they are saying is that if one wants to adopt, one should adopt ethically and, for many of us, fostering/adopting is the only ethical way to adopt.<br /><br />Perhaps it might help if one used the analogy of getting a pet. If someone said to many of us "I'm planning on getting a pedigree pup from the local puppy mill", many of us would probably say "why not get a dog from a pound or get a rescue greyhound" or something like that. It is about taking the most ethical approach when deciding on doing something.child/dog/catfree by choice (although I love children, dogs and cats)noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-72202614164751135602013-10-28T19:44:54.989-04:002013-10-28T19:44:54.989-04:00Am I now supposed to be looking for a child to ado...Am I now supposed to be looking for a child to adopt? News to me, and my husband. Lorraine Duskyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18285341379272250245noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-78730734572338423932013-10-28T19:43:06.410-04:002013-10-28T19:43:06.410-04:00It sounds like anyone "wallowing" for a ...It sounds like anyone "wallowing" for a child can just "get over it" by adopting out of foster care.<br /><br />Get on with it and adopt out of foster care. Stop being sad. No more wallowing! <br /><br />And adopting will make it all better. <br /><br />um......You all see why this is amusing, yes? Isn't it obvious why this is _hilarious_ to read on _this_ blog? <br /><br />All right -- anybody who is sad for a child needs to adopt out of foster care. I don't want to see any more wallowing. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-27254983924635473462013-10-28T19:28:31.229-04:002013-10-28T19:28:31.229-04:00"we weren't meant to become parents which..."we weren't meant to become parents which is why we are infertile. So I'm not sure why you believe my feeling is that we are owed a child when other members of your community clearly believe we weren't meant to parent any child."<br /><br />There's a new post about this. You're infertile because of God, or Nature's God, or Nature, or something to that effect, and it's Nature's way of controlling population growth.<br /><br />I don't know how donor sperm, egg, embryo fits into this theory. <br /><br /><br />Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-50326664638774642292013-10-28T18:29:16.697-04:002013-10-28T18:29:16.697-04:00We at FMF oppose the abuses in the child welfare s...We at FMF oppose the abuses in the child welfare system. We know that children may be placed in foster care by state child welfare agencies who could have stayed with their families. We have often cited the work of the National Coalition for Child Protection Reform (NCCPR.org) which works to end abuses by state agencies. <br /><br />Most children placed in foster care do return to their homes or the homes of close relatives. However, when a child in foster care is available for adoption, it is because the rights of his parents have been terminated. This happens only after a trial where the state proves the parents are unfit and have little likelihood to become fit. Parents have the right to appeal the judge's decision. Parents are represented by an attorney at public expense.<br /><br />Certainly there are abuses in these cases. The adoption industry pushed provisions in the 1997 Adoption and Safe Families Act to make it easier to terminate parents' rights in order to increase the supply of adoptable children.<br /><br />That being said, many foster children available for adoption do need families. We encourage anyone, fertile or infertile, who wants to build or expand their family through adoption to consider these children.Jane Edwardshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09715622112694146946noreply@blogger.com