tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post7771721128847366185..comments2024-03-27T20:48:39.389-04:00Comments on [Birth Mother] First Mother Forum: What's the difference between being adopted and being abducted?Lorraine Duskyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18285341379272250245noreply@blogger.comBlogger11125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-39376271867643520402011-02-16T16:41:09.025-05:002011-02-16T16:41:09.025-05:00This young woman's story only underscores the ...This young woman's story only underscores the idea that just because you want to reunite, and you've had a longing to do so or always felt that a core part of you was always missing, doesn't mean that when you reunite you'll find someone who can fulfill their part in your fantasy. Tied forever genetically and historically, nonetheless you are strangers, made so by a traumatic event and the passage of time. Why she would seek money now may be a matter of her upbringing. She does, after all, have a family already - even if it is through illegal abduction rather than legal adoption. <br /><br />So, the differing factor in this current abduction event and an adoption is the application of legal rights of one person (generally the parents, a-parents and sometimes b-parents) over another's (always the child's and sometimes the a- or b-parents).<br /><br />It is the adoptive parents' voices I do not hear out here in this discussion... why are they so silent? <br /><br />My a-mother is so self-centered, so threatened (with possibly some real reason for concern) and so self-justified in her own position as the charitable baby rescuer with "rights" to privacy, that she has absolutely no consideration for her adopted baby's feelings. Didn't when I was a baby, and doesn't now that I'm a middle-aged adult. To her it's all a folly, a waste of time. Something I just worry about too much or think about too much, just get over it already, we all have problems, just deal with it and suck up like the rest of us do you ungrateful orphan bastard child. How silly; just be happy. <br /><br />Perhaps that is reflective of our society's majority view, and what led the poor woman to steal a baby from the hospital in the first place... why wouldn't she think that it would all work out okay in the end anyway??Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-10668572782560562582011-02-14T01:05:36.076-05:002011-02-14T01:05:36.076-05:00Better to read this...
http://www.huffingtonpost....Better to read this...<br /><br />http://www.huffingtonpost.com/jennifer-lauck/abducted-versus-adopted-f_b_820920.html<br /><br />and then this...<br />http://www.huffingtonpost.com/jennifer-lauck/adoption-myth-buster-what_b_822175.htmlChrisnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-40440606252053724532011-02-13T15:21:43.704-05:002011-02-13T15:21:43.704-05:00""Ben had walked out of the waves...[as]...""Ben had walked out of the waves...[as] Sam Karras, a fine boy any parent would be proud to have raised; but Beth and Pat [his biological parents] had not."<br /><br />This may be because I only saw the movie version, but I never received that impression.Mei Linghttp://adoptionparadox.wordpress.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-13580028196754583732011-02-13T09:21:01.534-05:002011-02-13T09:21:01.534-05:00Adoption sounds like mental abduction.Adoption sounds like mental abduction.Robinnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-50219502276394042612011-02-12T20:50:47.938-05:002011-02-12T20:50:47.938-05:00The difference between adoption and abduction? In...The difference between adoption and abduction? In some cases, there is nothing but a piece of paper separating them. A piece of paper that states the abduction was sacntioned by law.Mysthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07425550479815459790noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-75150263132464615792011-02-12T11:56:27.541-05:002011-02-12T11:56:27.541-05:00I don't know, I'm not ready to condemn her...I don't know, I'm not ready to condemn her yet. This kind of reunion would already be difficult enough, but she's still young and been on her own since she was a teenager (I think). She is effectively a stranger to her family and is still trying to navigate her relationship with her possibly abusive* abductor's family. The reunion is only a month old and is being played out in national media.<br /><br />All of this I'd imagine would be hard enough to navigate without having the idea (however accurate) that however much her parents were emotionally affected, they still made serious bank over her kidnapping (and either spent it all or won't share it with her) floating around.<br /><br />So yeah, bringing up money probably wasn't a great move to make (but people don't also make the best decisions when grief, money and family meet), but that doesn't mean that she is only in it for the money or that she is the one solely responsible for her relationships not going smoothly.<br /><br />* well, abusive on top of the initial kidnappingdawnnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-26457581724909832172011-02-12T11:30:29.593-05:002011-02-12T11:30:29.593-05:00She was raised by criminals, and perhaps picked up...She was raised by criminals, and perhaps picked up the lifestyle. I hope this story sinks fast and does not get confused with adoptee searches. There have always been those, in most cases birthfathers, saying "all she wants is my money."maryannenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-23598687056066043032011-02-12T11:07:22.074-05:002011-02-12T11:07:22.074-05:00Right Lori, I was grossed out by this turn of even...Right Lori, I was grossed out by this turn of events.Lorraine Duskyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18285341379272250245noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-28640496613535223772011-02-12T10:48:40.944-05:002011-02-12T10:48:40.944-05:00I guess I am callous, but here goes - HUH? She wa...I guess I am callous, but here goes - HUH? She wants money? Wait, at what point, seriously, do we say how wrong is this? She has a rocky relationship with mom and wants money.....<br /><br />That is what disturbs me most. At what point is it really about money?Lorihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05815710859859029536noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-75422329007063278962011-02-11T18:20:13.825-05:002011-02-11T18:20:13.825-05:00Merci!Merci!Lorraine Duskyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18285341379272250245noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-574300303008890516.post-61587776453316359692011-02-11T18:15:15.076-05:002011-02-11T18:15:15.076-05:00Oh my, Lorriane, you and your daughter could be cl...Oh my, Lorriane, you and your daughter could be clones! Such adorable pix!Carolchttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12983135296851385826noreply@blogger.com