I relinquished through Bethany's "counselor" in the 80s. Just weeks later, I was recruited to speak on their behalf (on Q&A panels for potential adoptive couples).---------------------
They chose mothers who were only weeks to months post partum. The last time I spoke, I was the veteran at about two years into an open adoption that would later close. Though I spoke for them three times, never during these times did I know open adoption wasn't legally enforceable. They'd lead me to believe it was simply part of the adoption, with all the legalities as such. I didn't question it any more than I questioned the components of any legal process. (I also didn't know birth certificates were altered and sealed, another little omitted detail).
My counsel had been religiously based, and I was ripe for it at the time. Though I continually rejected the notion that I was a vessel to deliver a baby intended for someone else, I bought enough of their "act of redemptive love" feed to be a poster birth mom for a time. For a time.
I had said no to adoption. Had said no to them after giving birth, etc. They knew full well that I wanted to raise my child, but brought the big guns in after I delivered.
That was a long time ago. Looking back, I probably survived the first several years by believing it had been some divinely orchestrated plan.
I worry about some of the newer blogging birth moms. I worry about how this kind of belief system will hold up if an adoption closes or if a child doesn't perceive it the way the adults were counseled to. (I'm certain these moms were told by counselors, to greater or lesser degrees, that their children would be "grateful" for their "self sacrifice.")
I've seen that the age of 7 or 8 is a pivotal one in open adoptions. As the child seeks to forge his or her own relationship with his or her birth mother and begins to ask difficult questions of both birth and adoptive parents, this is where I've seen many open adoptions begin to close down.
Bethany prepares nobody for these questions. At least in the 80s and 90s, they fostered the archaic belief that there would be no need for such questions if a child was "well adjusted."
Some articles suggest that their core agenda is spreading the gospel via adoption into Christian families. I don't know that individual counselors operate with that belief, but the evidence is mounting against their tactics.
As for the bloggers you've mentioned, most are relatively newly into this. Time and experience will likely reinforce the beliefs of some and, sadly, shatter the beliefs of others.
I suspect, so long as Bethany views children as "angels" and relinquishing mothers as "redeemed" (rather than viewing all involved as merely human), the latter will occur more than the former.
*Overdoing everything [including writing] the doctor suspects led to a setback in the recovery of my shoulder surgery, and I have a bicep in spasm.
See also: Inconsolable grief
Catelynn & Tyler's open adoption will stay open; for other first mothers, not so much
(Pro) Adoption Special: Dr. Drew encourages teen moms to give up their babies