' [Birth Mother] First Mother Forum: Why Ellen Page and the movie Juno bugs me--even years later

Monday, October 21, 2013

Why Ellen Page and the movie Juno bugs me--even years later

At dinner with friends--one of them a Movie Buff--the other night, I mentioned that whenever I see Ellen Page, the star of Juno, anywhere doing anything I have an immediate negative reaction because of the role she played in that movie. She was the wise-cracking, smart-ass, but ever-so-appealing teenager in a jam (she is preggers) and she's about 15 or so in Juno, which is also her name in the film. Her very dorky and underwhelming-but-overwhelmed teenager father of the child is in no way prepared to be a father, or do anything but look lost.

Why that kind of girl wouldn't just have an abortion boggles the mind--as well as reality. Her family is not particularly religious, or evangelical; yet an unpleasant but frivolous encounter at the abortion clinic turns her off and sends her packing straight into the arms of a couple she finds in a penny-saver. "I could have this baby and give it to someone who totally needs one," she says enthusiastically. (No, I do not have perfect recall, I just watched the trailer at IMDB.)

I probably overstated my reaction--I said I change the channel if Page is on the tube, I just don't want to see her--and this lead to Movie Buff's surprise and amazement because Page, he said, can't be held responsible for the part she played, it was just a role, et cetera. He then went on to point out that "Ralph Fiennes played Amon Goth in Schindler's List and he was one of the most evil characters ever to appear in any movie--but he's Ralph Fiennes, not Amon Goth, and I don't believe he harbors any sadistic Nazi tendencies."

But we want our Nazis to be horrible! I responded. We all know what they did and being able to portray the Nazis who ran the concentration camps as the most evil people who ever lived naturally would be a role to savor. Anyone playing that part would only cement what we already know and feel about evil Nazis.

Our discussion continued the next day via email because I kept thinking about how what people do via adoption--and what celebrities and movie stars do in particular--colors how we feel about them--and adoption, as Jane discussed in the previous blog.  I don't think Movie Buff could see it from my point of view, which is to imagine Steven Spielberg and Ralph Fiennes making a movie about the holocaust that played into the delusions of holocaust deniers, and make Fiennes a devilishly charming and amusing fellow who might have a few qualms now and then, but what the hell! Exterminating Jews--that's life.

Instead of making giving up a child a mind-altering experience that leads to lifelong grief for most women, Page, as Juno, made it only somewhat disturbing to give up a child, and thus played right into to mind set of the people who really "need" a baby. Furthermore, Page made finding a cute couple like Jennifer Garner and her husband (who splits before the kid actually arrives) a possible and cool thing to do. In other words, Juno strengthened the view that "birth" mothers are, in the end, more or less fine with giving up a child to somebody who really needs a baby. Then teens like Juno/Page get on with their lives and go back to their boyfriends without much trauma. We see some of Juno's distress, but in the context of the character, you see her getting on honky-dory with her life after childbirth.

What possible impact did Juno have, continue to have? I know that at least one young woman who knows me well and said that she doesn't have the same view of adoption as I do--whatever that meant. I do know that she saw Juno and thought it was probably a realistic view of what it would be like to give up a baby. We had to agree not to talk about Juno. I am sure she is not alone in her opinion, and that Juno had an impact not only on young, impressionable women, but also prospective adoptive parents who do not want to think about how awful it could possibly be to give up a child.

My college-student friend did not see Mother and Child, a movie that realistically depicts relinquishing a child, but did not have anywhere near the impact or reach of Juno, even with stars such as Annette Bening and Naomi Watts. Bening is the first mother who doesn't get her life back together; Watts is the tough-as-nails adoptee who doesn't know who she is and gets pregnant herself, and dies in childbirth. "Every thought in my head takes me back to her," Bening says. And: "I know in my heart we will meet one day and you will forgive me." That's dialogue that many of us can relate to, in contrast to the one-liners in Juno.

I don't think any comedy about giving up a child is palatable, just as a smart comedy about the holocaust wouldn't be either. Perhaps others can find any subject open to humor, but relinquishing my daughter scarred my life to the point where I'll never be laughing at jokes about giving up a baby. (For those who wonder, I saw Juno at home, by myself, with a box of tissues. I wanted to see the movie, but knew I couldn't handle it in a theater with other people laughing at jokes that made me cringe.)

Diablo Cody, the young woman who wrote the smart script for Juno, is of course where Juno, the movie, all began, and who I hold most responsible for the despicable film. Cody said in interviews that's what it would be like if she got pregnant, a statement so ignorant and vacuous as to make my head hurt.  Diablo Cody won the Oscar for Best Original Screenplay for Juno. Jane reports she heard Terry Gross of Fresh Air on NPR interview the director Jason Reitman, who said he had an adopted sister and was pleased to be able to do a move to show how wonderful adoption can be. 

Jane's previous post about celebrity adoptions led to comments from readers wanting to add to the list of other stars who have adopted because we, both adoptees and first mothers, know that their doing so encourages more adoptions. Our opinion of them is somewhat framed by their adoption, especially if they keep at it, and get more children borne by other women. Movie Buff wanted to know if my blog readers had the same opinion as me. In other words, am I crazy, and am I over-reacting, or what? Some of you must have seen Juno. Or not? Opinions wanted.--lorraine
Birth Mother's Lament: The Pain of Giving Away My Baby
Adoption, It Seems, Is Everywhere, coming to a screen near you
Is adoption ever funny to the adopted, to first mothers?
Life Unexpected an Unexpected Hit on the CW
Mother and Child is a film not be be missed, though critics overlooked
Jane's previous post:Why I'm not bullish on celebrity adoptions

Mother and Child "Nine Lives director Rodrigo García explores the maternal instinct in Mother and Child through three disparate L.A. women: Karen (Annette Bening), a physical therapist, cares for her ailing mother; Elizabeth (Naomi Watts) works as a high-powered attorney; and Lucy (Kerry Washington), a bakery owner, plans to adopt (only Lucy has a spouse). An opening sequence reveals that Karen, who became pregnant at 14, gave Elizabeth up for adoption. Though the daughter has no desire to track down the mother, Karen has been mourning her loss for decades, never working up the nerve to take the next step. All three turn to the same adoption agency (Cherry Jones, who donned a nun's habit for Broadway's Doubt, plays Sister Joanne). When Karen yields to the advances of a kindly divorcé (Jimmy Smits), and Elizabeth, who's been sleeping with her boss (Samuel L. Jackson) and her married neighbor (Marc Blucas), finds herself with child, their feelings of anger and resentment start to melt. Lucy, meanwhile, has been meeting with a prickly expectant mother (Half Nelson's Shareeka Epps) who may hold the key to her happiness--assuming that a baby will solve all life's problems. García clearly venerates motherhood, but he doesn't let any of his characters off the hook: Karen can be cruel, Elizabeth can be cold, and Lucy can be whiny, but they overcome their lesser natures. There are a few missteps, like a soft-focus montage toward the end, but García manages a sprawling cast with finesse, and his gifted leads have rarely been better. --Kathleen C. Fennessy"--Amazon

Other movies that portray adoption realistically:    
Secrets and Lies (For some reason this film is amazingly expensive, I suggest renting it if you have not seen it. A touching but messy reunion. Mike Leigh directed, Brenda Blethyn is the mother.)
Casa de los Babys  (Adopting from South and Central America; should be tough for adoptive parents with children from poor countries to watch. John Sayles directed.)
Loggerheads (Have not seen, but others rave about it)
Oranges and Sunshine (A courageous social worker in England reunites children removed from England and sent to Australia, very realistic, and a true story.) 
Rabbit-Proof Fence  (About the forced adoption of aboriginal children in Australia; bring a hanky. No, bring two.)
Gosford Park  (One of my favorite movies all all time. Great acting, great story. What did I read about the writer, Julian Fellowes? Is is possible he is adopted? If you remember this tidbit from somewhere, please leave a comment. Also tell me if I am delusional about this.)
Order or rent the films by clicking on the links. 


  1. I also hate that movie....that was the reason why I choose adoption, a year after the movie came out. Honestly, adoption probably would have never entered my realm if not for Juno. I really though because, I was so much like the character Juno (I mean it was uncanny- I even had a friend refer to me as Juno while prego) that I too would be able to get over childbirth...WHAT A FARCE! I think if I ever actually did see Paige(I think that's the actresses' name) I'd probably punch her in the face. She and that movie are responsible for all the grief I have felt as a natural mother, because without that movie (seed) I'd probably be parenting my daughter.

  2. I haven't seen it. I don't want to see it. I didn't find out til about four and a half years after my son was adopted that my in-laws had been struggling to have their own child (it's my ex's mother and stepfather). I thought it was just a vendetta against me that had them keeping my son. I didn't know they were using me too. There's nothing cute or hip about that.

  3. You make an excellent point about Juno. About taking something traumatic and making a comedy out of it. I also saw Mother and Child and found it very painful to watch. It was such a well-acted film even if a bit contrived at the end. I'm not sure why Juno had so much more impact. Better marketing??

  4. I know Ashley Salazar from 16 & Pregnant has written about her disdain for "Juno" on her blog.

    She's written about how damaging it is for falsely portraying adoption and how much of a shock it was for her when she actually did become pregnant as a teen and "chose" adoption. Ashley is also never shy about the fact that she regrets her adoption and desperately wants her daughter back.

    "Juno" has not only directly influenced first mothers to look at adoption, but it affects the whole world by perpetuating the misconception that adoption is a happy, easy thing. That's one of the biggest obstacles we face for adoption reform, and "Juno" is one of the biggest modern enforcers of that obstacle.

  5. I'm with you. I can't see any movie with Ellen Page. It's too triggering. I'll never see her as anyone but that pregnant girl who was so cavalier about giving her baby away. It made me sick the way she found PAPs through the Pennysaver. I mean, how safe! The Pennysaver is a good place to sell used furniture, not to find complete strangers to raise your child. I then was annoyed when she met the PAPs with their attorney and said she wanted a closed adoption, done deal, didn't want anything to do with the child again. I kept wondering how the child would feel about that. And then the ending was the worse. Strumming a guitar and singing with the father of her child as if having the baby and giving it up was just a blip on the radar and life will go on as usual.

    I remember having a talk with a friend of mine, who knows my whole story, and she said how she enjoyed the movie and found it entertaining. I tried to get across how it was sending a very dangerous message to young women who may find themselves in Juno's situation, but she didn't really think people would make real life decisions based on a movie. It's scary to read the comments here that some young women actually did choose adoption because of Juno.

  6. There are a lot of comments too on Facebook at the FMF page.

  7. SkiptheheartsandflowersOctober 21, 2013 at 7:09 PM

    I made the mistake of purchasing Juno when it first came out on DVD. I heard rave reviews and had hoped they would portray teen pregnancy and adoption loss in a more realistic way. (I guess I was drinking too much of the Koolaid then.) I found the movie very distressing to watch. I still have the DVD and have considered trashing it rather than giving it away to share adoption lies with others. I never did understand why the movie was so well-received.

    I found Page's portrayal of the teen to be very unrealistic and nothing like the way I felt as a pregnant teen in the '80s. She was very non-chalant about her pregnancy. I did not like the "humor" of the movie. It just wasn't funny. I also found it disturbing Juno was willing to give her child to a couple with marital problems. The couple, especially the female, seemed exceedingly needy. I would have thought even those who have not experienced adoption would be troubled by such a needy woman becoming a "mother" to Juno's child. It did not seem at all to be about the welfare of the child. (That part WAS realistic, infant adoption is RARELY about the child's needs and primarily about the adoptive parents needs, IMO.)

    I agree, Lorraine, that this movie is one to burn. A-ha, now I know what to do with the DVD collecting dust in my cupboard!!

  8. I was watching a Woody Allen Movie she was in recently and I had to turn it off. In part because it was awful and also because she was in it and I honestly can not stand her. All I see is Juno.
    There was a blogger who chose to put her third child up for adoption because she thought it would be like Juno. She found herself shocked and surprised when the AP's cut off all contact. Making "an adoption plan" was not so wonderful anymore. It was sad to see her face reality. She eventually stopped blogging altogether.
    "Juno" was written by a woman who had no real-life experience with adoption. I think many women were duped by that movie. Very sad.

  9. I don't live on USA; in my country, all adoptions are made by the government with strict regulations and, aside some court fees, it costs nothing.
    I also remember having a conversation about Juno with my coworkers and the overall opinon was "the film is great, Kimya (who made the soundtrack) is awesome, but it's just plain sad that in the end she didn't keep the baby".
    Then another coworker who is from an hardcore evangelical church (anti-choice, no sex before marriage and all the jazz) came to us and said: "Oh my God that movie us horrible. I mean, her father was great, her stepmom seemed supportive, she wasn't on drugs or anything, why on earth she gave the baby away?!"
    When you remove the money (and the propaganda machine) from adoption, people tend to be more supportive towards family preservation.

  10. Tell Movie Buff that YES, we agree with you. Probably because most of us lost a child to adoption, know how it really feels, and that it is not fodder for a comedy. I refused to see Juno at the theater, didn't really want to see it at all, but after it was out on DVD, I rented it and watched it alone. Made me sick to my stomach. I'm kind of a movie buff too, and I didn't even think it was that good. Couldn't believe it was nominated for Best Picture! I hate that it might have influenced even ONE young pregnant woman to give up her child, that it's no big deal. I fear it has influenced many. As for Ellen Page, I don't care one way or the other. Haven't seen her in anything else, or maybe didn't recognize her. It wasn't her script. The only way these people could redeem themselves, IMHO, would be to make another film, Juno 20 or 30 years later, honestly showing how that decision and act impacted her life. Not so cavalier now, eh?

  11. Denise, wish someone would make that movie...
    I watched the trailer and that's all I can handle.

  12. Everything I read about the film told me it was schlock. The only adoption film I've seen (and dearly love) is Mike Leigh's Secrets and Lies. I adore Brenda Blethyn.

    As for great comedy about the Third Reich ... don't forget The Producers by Mel Brooks (himself Jewish). It was trashed in the beginning and now is a classic.

  13. I absolutely abhor that movie, for the same reasons as you.

    Does it do any harm?

    Well, when my son and I were newly reunited, he thought my experience of giving him up was like Juno's.

    He thought that erroneous thought because the film got Society's great big thumbs up, and because nowhere else was there a representation of what it was actually like.

    The harm 'Juno' did was to tell my son that he was given up with a minor ripple to my life, and an odd tear.

    It tried to tell him that the bond between us was light, and interchangeable.

    It suggested I basically skipped on with my life, after some easy consoling.

    It made his connection to me, and mine to him, largely inconsequential and neatly replaceable.

    The depth of our happiness when we met, and of our relief, and of our sorrow, tells us the truth about what it was really like for us.

    Everything, including this criminally trivial film, tries to undermine and dismiss the connection between us. It's imperative that we hold on to our own truths, and for those who can express these to do so.

    So thank you Lorraine and Jane for this invaluable blog.

  14. I never want to watch Juno. I generally do not watch adoption-themed stuff. Why make myself mad and more miserable? I did watch Secrets and Lies and like Sara C. loved it.

    I don't blame actors for the roles they play, but do blame Woody Allen for having sex with his long-term lover's adopted daughter. Emotional incest, anyone?

    Also loved "The Producers" as does my Jewish husband. Sometimes mocking evil is the best revenge. I'd love to see a Mel Brooks adoption movie mocking adoption sacred cows.

    I find it incredibly sad that some women were influenced by Juno to surrender their children. Real life is not a movie.

  15. My thoughts on Juno:

    Purely as entertainment, I enjoyed the movie. Surprisingly, and probably because I gave up my son long before this movie came out, it was not triggering for me. However, I can completely understand the disdain from others.

    The movie is clearly not based in reality. The Juno character (or caricature) seems to be denying any natural bond to the child she is growing. In real life, a person with her personality and no religious affiliations whatsoever would most likely terminate the pregnancy. I don't know any first mother who would so flippantly choose adoption because they could "totally give the baby to someone who needs one." That's just ridiculous.

    The adoption seems to center around the adotive mother's deep seeded want to have a child. Adoption should always be about what is best for the person who is going to be adopted. In the situation portrayed in the movie the PAP's are going to be going through a divorce right off the bat. Is that really in a person's best interest to be given to a woman who clearly will be dealing with a major life upheaval while in the throes of new motherhood?

    The one thing in this movie that bothered me was the scene between Juno and her stepmother after the baby is born. Juno is upset and the stepmother tells her that eventually she will be back here when the time is right (or something to that effect). I was told something similar many times post relinquishment by well meaning family and friends and it just doesn't ring true. It would be similar to telling a mother who lost her child that she can go on to have other children. That is really not the point, the grieving is for THIS child, children and people are not interchangeable. I wouldn't even say something so ridiculous to someone grieving the loss of a pet. The new pet doesn't replace the pet that is gone.

    I can absolutely see how this movie could persuade an expectant mother into believing adoption is "cool" and that she can just go one with her life like nothing happened. I guess if a person is a sociopath, I could see how that is an accurate portrayal. Even those mothers who are at peace with their adoption experience would probably tell you that their life was forever altered because of it.

    Honestly, this movie would have been more realistic if Juno had decided to raise her child. It could have showed Juno's guilt over not following through with the PAP's, it could have shown the bravery of standing up for yourself and your child when faced with familial pressure to relinquish, it could have shown how fathers have just as much of a responsibility and a right to raise their children as mothers, it could have shown Juno struggling with motherhood years down the road but at peace with her decision to raise her child, and so on and so forth.

    Although I was entertained by this movie and found parts of it humorous, I absolutely do not think it is based on any type of reality and I absolutely agree with previous commenters and the original post that the movie is dangerous for young expecting mothers.

  16. Feeling rather bad for Ellen Page here. She was only eighteen or nineteen when she played Juno. It's hard to imagine any young aspiring actress would turn down that part down on principle. Nowadays she describes herself as a pro-choice feminist. No idea if that says anything about she feels about the way adoption is practiced in America today.

    I hoped "Juno" was going to be satirical, but it turned out to be IMO superficial and cynical. It's hard to imagine anyone being influenced by it, but then I'm old and maybe don't get it.

    "We want our Nazis to be horrible."
    Schindler was a Nazi and he saved hundreds of lives.

    I liked Secrets and Lies a lot too. Another really good movie that deals with relinquishment/adoption loss in a realistic way, is Gosford Park, directed by Robert Altman and scripted by Julian Fellowes, the creator of Downton Abbey. Downton was originally intended as a spin-off of Gosford but it took on a fantasy life of its own. Without the Altman touch Downton rings false to me.

  17. Completely agree about Secrets and Lies and the surprise in Gotsford Park--one of my favorite movies of all time. I remember reading something about Julian Fellowes that made sense of the adoption plot in Gotsford Park, but a quick survey of Fellowes on the web reveals nada. Anyone remember what I do? Is is possible he is adopted himself? That's what I am remembering but I could be all wrong.

    Going to add those movies to the list on the blog.

  18. Julian Fellowes To Open New Adoption Centre
    17th December 2012

    "Dorset's award winning writer Julian Fellowes is to open a new adoption centre in Dorchester today.

    Local adoption Agency, Families for Children, will also be making a plea for more adoptive families to come forward.

    The agency hopes their new centre in Dorchester will raise awareness and dispel some of the myths about adoption."

    That's all I could find.

  19. I saw Juno years ago when I was "just" an adoptee. Thought it was kinda cute, had no effect on me at all. Recently, I caught 10-15 minutes of it on tv. I am now a Bmom, and was surprised at how awful her character and the entire movie actually is.

  20. I never saw the movie but from what others have said I guess it is just a blip on the radar to relinquish your child to adoption.

    With that said the suicide rate for Juno, Alaska is much more than the national average. Just saying.....

  21. This is my son's birthday and I'm trying to decide whether or not to call him Talking about Juno reminds me of me at that age when I was on Medicaid and my son was born Nothing is free They put him in foster care and promised to give him back when I got "on my feet" It never happened I feel like I'm going crazy I vowed never to take another penny of government assistance and for 30+ years I have been paying into a Blue Cross policy which just notified me it's dropping me. I still have 3 years before Medicare and feel like I did when they wouldn't give my son back-like killing myself. Just figured out why I'm feeling like this

  22. I think overall Juno portrayed a very flippant attitude towards adoption which is why Hollywood loved it so much. Feeds right into the egos of all those celebrity adopters. I'm sorry that young girls and adoptees were influenced by this movie.

    That said, there was some interesting subtext in the movie regarding repeating patterns of abandonment. Juno's own mother remarried and had "replacement kids" as Juno calls them with disdain. She sends occasional gifts to Juno but beyond that she is virtually absent from her life. Juno herself explicitly labels it as abandonment, yet she goes on to the very same thing with her own child.

    I think family patterns do repeat throughout generations. They are are often reenacted unconsciously (even in movies). Is it possible to identify and break these cycles before the damage is done? I have my doubts...

  23. I don't think the adoption plot in Gosford Park had anything to do with Julian Fellowes. The storyline for the production was by Bob Balaban and Robert Altman. Julian Alexander Kitchener-Fellowes, Baron Fellowes of West Stafford, was hired to write the screenplay.

    Fellowes is an English actor, novelist, film director and screenwriter, as well as a Conservative member of the House of Lords. Downton Abbey is his creation. His wife is story editor for the series. Both he and his wife are practicing Catholics.

  24. It's never too late for a reunion.


  25. I bought Juno because I thought it would be a good "sit down and watch with my daughter how difficult teen pregnancy is" kind of movie - wrong! She thought all about how sweet it was that Juno was giving her baby to this couple. Juno did not react in a normal way, she mostly totally tuned out to the baby. She was sad at the hospital or whatever, but it wasn't much. I thought it was very unrealistic. We didn't watch it again. I LOVED Rabbit-Proof Fence....very sad, but amazing story about their journey back to their family. I will have to look for the other two. I also watched October Baby, and was so disappointed in how the birth mother completely wanted nothing to do with her beautiful child that I just couldn't stomach it - also, unrealistic for most. People don't seem to want to watch the real stuff - only the happy ending story book stuff. No one outside the adoption world seems to want to know about the pain.
    My grandmother (adoptive) was an Orphan Train Rider. I try to find movies about the Orphan Train....not in big supply. We are trying to find out as much as we can about her possible background, but it had to be awful for her, she was only 2 or 3 and no one wanted a little girl who couldn't work. Plus, whatever precipitated her separation from her parents - we have no idea. Her older brother was on the train with her....but he was taken by a different family. Some books make it seem romantic and adventurous, a good will kind of thing for these people to be doing for these children, whatever...I don't think there are very many that deal with that kind of adoption holocaust. If you know of any more, let me know!

  26. Another adoption movie in the works. Deepak Mehta, (best known for her Elements Trilogy, Earth, Fire, and Water) is adapting Shilpi Somaya Gowda's novel "Secret Daughter" into a movie. The story revolves around a Mumbai family forced to give up their daughter for adoption because of poverty and prejudice against girls, the San Francisco family who adopted her and Asha's search as a young adult for her origins.


  27. Oops, I meant to include this link in my comment about the "Secret Daughter" movie:

  28. I wanted to come back and thank all the commenters who mentioned the movie, Mother and Child. I watched it last night and absolutely loved it. Thanks for the suggestion.

  29. I have to agree with most of the comments, being a birth mother myself, that Juno was a pretty harsh view of what adoption really is and entails. I also don't think making a similar comparison to the Holocaust, or Nazis, is accurate either. There's nothing about the decision to place your child for adoption that is easy, simple, unemotional, and that doesn't affect you for the rest of your life. I also don't think we can curse Page for the role she played in the movie either. She's an actress and played a "part" in a movie. Movies are marketed and publicized and I don't know of many movies that have been done on adoption, or birth mothers, that truly captures the emotions and just how heartbreaking the decision to place really is. I think society in general has a difficult time with the whole topic of adoption and therefore to not delve into the heart and soul of birth moms, makes it easier to deal with. Why not break through all the superficial stereotypes and stigmas and talk about the truth, the blessing and the heartbreak? I've started a new blog for all to weigh in on adoption topics at loveofabirthmom.com
    I'd love to hear your thoughts. Heidi Russo

  30. MY favorite adoption themed movie is Widow's Peak with Mia Farrow and Natasha Richardson. It involves a complicate plot where in the end a reunited adoptee and birthmother get over on a whole self-righteous Irish village. Check it out, I think most will enjoy it. The adoption part does not come out until late in the movie, but it is what motivates everything.

  31. Thanks, Maryanne, I have never heard of this movie.There is also an Indy movie called Breakfast for Pluto...from IMDB:

    "In the 1970s, a young transwomen, Patrick "Kitten" Braden, comes of age by leaving her Irish town for London, in part to look for her (first) mother and in part because his gender identity is beyond the town's understanding."

    The scene in which he meets his mother--as I recall he/she does not tell her she is his/her mother is very touching and realistic.

  32. I cant even see a preview on cable or even think about it, makes me sick.

  33. When I was newly reunited I was taken out to lunch by a bunch of suppliers, mostly women. I told them all how awful adoption turned out for me and my daughter and how horrific is was. They were all very sympathetic and compassionate. They seemed to really get it. And then someone brought up Juno and they all went on a roll with how Fing wonderful the movie was. I had used up my time to talk (probably went over my socially acceptable allotted time – but I was the customer!) and just emotionally threw up my arms in despair. No one gets how horrific it is, especially when Hollywood glamorizes it. Makes me sick!

  34. A movie I want to see is "Philomena", starring Judi Dench, about a mother's search for the son she was forced to give up for adoption fifty years ago in Ireland.
    It played to acclaim at the Venice Film Festival and the Toronto International Film Festival and has just premiered in London. Rotten Tomatoes gives it a whopping 4 1/2 stars.



  35. I am dying to see Philomena myself!

    We've mentioned it before. It won the prize as best movie by audience vote at the Hamptons Film Festival.

  36. Hate Juno, can't stand Ellen Page, and I want to stab Jennifer Garner's character and Juno's parents.

  37. Philomena forgives the nuns who stole her son:




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